|^cRazY cOupLe kIds jUfaMaLEe^|

bElatEd 28 mth aNiversAry ceLebrAtioN..

2010-11-12T01:09:00.001+08:00

WonDerfUl dAe... ThOuGh i fAileD my bTt, ovEraLL waS a suPerb dAe 4 uS... KinDa diSsappOintEd bUt cN alWaes tRy aGain anOther rOund ritE... Hmmmm...AfTer dAt weN 4 ouR luNch cuM dinnEr at cWp 4 bAn mIan... FAv!!! N syG hAd toM yAm baN miAn 4 oNce coZ dAt giRl peKak dEn salAh kaSi.. Lol!! CiaN DiE...AfTer dAt hAd whIte caRrot caKe... NiCee!! Hehe... SLack dEre awhiLe n wOre ouR neW rinG daT we bouGht de dae b4 ytd... Nicee... He choose iT n i loVe iT aloT... AftEr 28 mths dEn we hAd neW rIng... NExt will b 3 yeArs tIme... InSyaLLah.... AfTer whiCh WalK2 hEre n dEre tiLl wE ended uP at coFfee bEan aT civIc centRe... Had 3C... YuMmy... But sAd cAse stOmacH ache aftEr dat... Lol... HAd soMe tranFeriNg here n Dere... ChaTting n fOto taKing... Been a lOng timE sincE we lAst tooK pictUre toGether... KiNda miSs it... Hmmm... AlReadi 8 plUs so hEaDed tO j.e... SyG seNd me dEre... Hehe... So niCe of hiM... OvEraLL iT waS totAli a perFect dAe 4 uS... No arGuemEnts at All... FEels so HaPpy!!! HW i wIsh iT cuD b lIke diS aLwaE... Hmmmm.... I wiSh...

nO mOre sUnshine

2010-11-09T08:48:00.001+08:00

HaRder n hArdEr tO sMiLe dAe aFter dAe.... IsNt mE anImoRe... HaiS..

hAppY dAe oUtIng....

2010-11-08T23:33:00.001+08:00

Had fun spending time wif bestie... Thnx 4 layaning my nonsences today...WeN rP 4 luNch... WEn hEr hoUse tO lEpaK tiLL arD 5 pLus... DeN oFf to viVo 4 moVie... TiLL dEn...

nEw beGinIng sToRy TalE..

2010-11-06T12:29:00.001+08:00

Still the same old faeza dat have been blogging since de dae dis was created till nw... Lots of things have been taking place here n dere... All sort of incidents...Nothing new to her but still new to others.....Begin wif her new life wif her new job...Nth WOW abt it to her... Jst smth dat normal ppl wud wan to work as cume cnt get in... Dun even count nyself lucky to get in dis but ok la... New xperience afterall... Been in for like 1 mth plus i guess... Crazy lots of things have taken place... Some are good... Some are bad... Its up to individual to judge it... To me it's all learning lessons... Being in working life is alwaes like dis... Nth special nth shocking... Predictable.... Lets c hw long will this have to cont till the story ends....At last taking my btt now... Hope things goes on smoothly... Kinda scared but haf to do it now if nt da mls susah... Haha...111110 will be de dae dat will determine my 1st start....School starting in jan 2011.... Now waiting for the package to come n den choose the modules... Gonna haf to save up on schools n also license... Meaning to sae dat im gonna have to stop wasting money on unnecessary things by next year.... No more stress = shopping rulez....Counting down to 2011... May it b a better year ahead for me n my love ones..N i love jumali alwaes.... <3

bOred-nEss....

2010-07-17T23:48:00.002+08:00

2nd week of training haf come to an end....
lOts of things have happen...
slOwly eAch & evEryoNe's aTtitude iS beIng reVeAl...
bE it thE gOOd oR bAd oNes ...

probLems wiLL never lEavE me aLone...
oNe aFter aNother....
NatUre oF lIfe..
aLwaEs tAke iT poSitiveLy....
dAt's iMpt aNd dUn lEt it bRing u Down tO dE dRaIn..
buT suMtiMe tHingS happEn uNknOwInglY....
dAt's wAt I hAte iT sO mUch....

fOr wat i kNow dAt i Love hIm...
nO mAtter wAt haPPen...

sIck....

2010-07-07T21:51:00.002+08:00

pLaNinG tO sLp eArly...
hEad sPiNing rOund & rOund....
nOse iS liKe a LicKing wAter tAp...
fEeel so wEak anD tiRed ...

nEarly 10 pEople wAs sIck in cLaSs...
tHanks 2 dE sPreadEr daT sprEAd it...
hOpefuLLy tO reCovEr sOon...
tIme fLieS rEalLy fAst...
aLL dAt I knOw iT's alReady eNd oF 2 mThs...
hEhe... sTill 7 wEeks lEft tO gOooo....

aLwaEs lOokiNg fOrwArd tO evErynIte...
wAitiNg fOr hIS mSges....
pAtieNce iS aLL nEedEd in R/S...
dAt's wAt i'Ve leArned....
rEgaRdlEss oF hW sIck i Am...
i'LL stIll kIp mySelF aWake Like nOw..,
mIss hIm eVerY nOw aNd dEn...
tHinKing oF wAT hE's dOing aNd All...

wEekEnd wIll b De bESt dAE...
sPenD tIme wIf oNlI hYm n nO1 Else...
mOvIes, pIcniC, shOppIng, lUncH, dInnEr...
lOts mOre tHinGs wE diD.....
1 mOre dAe tO wKenDs and i'Ll b HappY...

gOnNa tUrn 2 yEars oLd iN 2 dAes tIme...
tOns aNd tOns oF tHinGs hAppeNs bTwn uS....
uPs aNd dOwNs iN a r/S aRE aLwaEs dEre w/O fAil...
jUSt dE mAttEr oF hW wiSe u Are iN dEaLing wItH iT...
nO1 iS bOrN pErfeCt...
nO1 iS bOrn to jUst fOlloW bLindLy...
nO1 aRE bOrn fEelIngleSS....
iT aLwAes tAke 2 PerSon to Make tHings haPPen...
not 1 but 2...

tHings hAppeN fOr sUm ReasOn....
dAt's aLwAes wAt pEoPle sAe....
soMewAe sOmehw wE'll kNoe dE rEAson 1 DAe...
iT's aLL tHe MattErs oF tIme...
lOVe hUrts....
bUt weN tHingS gOeS wEll, iT's dE mOst bEautiFul tHing...

dErE's sOmetHing bOthEriNG me bUt jSt cNt fInd wHo I cUd sHAre...
tO gEt opInIon....
oTher pOinT oF vIews...
gEttiNg iT oUt fRm mY hEad...
wIsh dAT i cUd wAsh aWay uNneCcesArY tHinGS...

I wISh i CUd......

2010-06-25T09:50:00.002+08:00

rAin-iNg caT & dOg...

duN feEl liKe woRking eVeN fOr dE sAke oF lAst dAy.... 1sT thIng iN dE moRninG, gT tO knOw dAt iT wAs rAinIng hEavYly... pArt tU mCm mLs jEr tk gO wErk.... fEelIng sOo dAmn mOodlEss.... fEel lIke bEing aLone fOr sUm rEason bUt yEt i dUn wIsh tO kIp tHinGs tO mySelf cOz nOt hEaltHy.... SorRy iF i'M nOt bEing MysElf lAtely.... lOts oF tHinGs hAppeNing & iT fEels fRustRatiNg.... wIsh dAt fEelIng cUd jSt lEaVe mE aLoNe... hAisSss....

pLanIng fOr tHis wEekend wiLl b jUst mItiNg uP wIth hAirA, tOyOl, nUrUl, bF, AnWar & eZa...
wAtChiNg & dInnEr i gUeSs.... hMmmm... bEen sOmetIme sInCe wE'vE bEen lEpAk-iNg toGetHer... mIss tHem thOugH.... gOnnA haF ArNold b4 dAt .... SuNdaY wILL mIt wIf bEsTie...
mIsS hEr sO mUch... bUt nVm mIt hEr 4 bReaKfAst.... dEn aLL dE wAe wIll b wIth bF... iMy...

2010-06-24T11:48:00.002+08:00

rOtTing iN the OffIce...

cOuntIng dOwn tO dE laSt daE in hEre... kinDa of haPPynEss aNd jOynEss... oUt fRm a PlaCe i cNt rEally woRk aT.... stIll RobiNsoNS is De bEst pLaCe tO woRk aT fOr nOw.... nO stReSs anD haPpenIng.... sHoppIng aNd LifEly.... RuLeS arE rUleZ buT nT lIke a sChOol aS eVeryThing cAnnot bE doNe bUt yeT oTher dO iT bUt no1 sAys aNitin... sO unFaiRneSs heRe...

28 jUn wIlL bE d3 sTart of a NeW liFe... enVironMent, pEoplE, rOutiNe... @ laSt gEt to lEarN soMethIng aBout Law.... cOol bUt cHallEnginG as nEed to cRack hEad tO lEarn aNd Take TesT fOr thE 1St yEar.... OtHer dEn tHat, nEw xPeriEnce oF wOrkiNg in CivIL sErvaNt....tHeRe gOes mY weEkdAeS bEinG fiLLed uP.... wKeNds wiLL b bOyfwN's dAe.... cNt wAit tO mIt hIm..

gOt a nEw LeVi's wAtcH fRm sIstAz... rEd cOlor sEem tO b a nIce coLor.... lUv iT.....
hAd dInNer wIth tHem @ pIzzA hUt... bEen a lOng tIme sInce wE haD dInnEr tOgetHer...
fEeLs sO hAppY beIng bAck tOgethER deSpiTe tHe aRgUemeNts aNd aLl....
wIsh thaT wiLl sTays fOreVeR.... lUv tHeM lOts....

loTs oF thIngs haPPenIng daY bY dAy.... yEt daT dsNt maKe mE fEel lIke gIvinG uP oR wAt...
iNstEad iT maKe mE tHink bEtteR aS thIngs haPPen fOr sOme rEasOn... A rEasoN thAt oNly cAn bE fOund iF tHe tImE rEaLly cOmes.... nO uSe cRacKiNg hEad anD thInk... iT wUd bE oUt..

hMmMm.... tHe eNd.....

2010-06-24T10:41:00.002+08:00

I remember years ago. Someone told me I should take. Caution when it comes to love.
I did, I did. And you were strong and I was not. My illusion, my mistake. I was careless, I forgot
I did. And now when all is done. There is nothing to say. You have gone and so effortlessly
You have won. You can go ahead tell them. Tell them all I know now. Shout it from the roof tops
Write it on the skyline. All we had is gone now. Tell them I was happy. And my heart is broken
All my scars are open. Tell them what I hoped would be. Impossible, impossible. Impossible,impossible

Falling out of love is hard. Falling for betrayal's worse. Broken trust and broken hearts
I know, I know. Thinking all you need is there. Building faith on love and words. Empty promises will wear. I know, I know

And know when all is gone. There is nothing to say. And if you're done with embarrassing me
On your own you can go ahaed tell them. Tell them all I know now. Shout it from the roof tops
Write it on the skyline. All we had is gone now. Tell them I was happy. And my heart is broken
All my scars are open. Tell them what I hoped would be. Impossible, impossible. Impossible, impossible. Impossible, impossible. Impossible, impossible. Ooh impossible (yeah yeah)

I remember years ago. Someone told me I should take. Caution when it comes to love
I did. Tell them all I know now. Shout it from the roof tops. Write it on the skyline. All we had is gone now. Tell them I was happy. And my heart is broken. All my scars are open. Tell them what I hoped would be. Impossible, impossible. Impossible, impossible. Impossible, impossible
Impossible, impossible

I remember years ago. Someone told me I should take. Caution when it comes to love. I did

2010-06-22T23:24:00.003+08:00

pIctUre tAken at pAsiR riS bEach afTer baThiNg.... haAhhahAH... beEn a vEri lOng tIme siNce iM liKe upDating iT buT yAh.... evEryoNe iS buzy anD so aM I..... lItte uPdate aBt myseLf.... gOnna sTaaRt mY nEw jOb sooOOnnn....

hOpefuLly thIngs goEs smOotHly aS plAnned.... goNNa b iN HTA fOr liKe 2 mOnths.... gOod tHing nOt tIll buLan pUaSe iF nT goNNa penGsaN.... bEen wiF hIm foR liKe alMost gOnnA b 2 yRs... lOts n Tons of ThingS daT haF happEn fRm thE daE we gOt toGethEr tIll nOw.... dAt'S waT relAtionShip aRe.... upS n dOwnS of iT..... hoPes daT wE'll lAst fOrEver.... dAt's aLL fOr nOw ...... =))

2009-12-14T22:30:00.002+08:00

first thing 1st...
wen to vivo on the sat after a few hours emo-ing...
been a rough days since last wks...
lots of things have been taking place...
wasnt in the rite mind & emotions...
so complicated....
tanx to mummy dat she met me...
made me laugh n 4get about being angry...
wen he's infornt of me, cnt afford to be mad...
de feeling just change...
undescribe-able....
love him....
alot....

did smth funny on thurs...
wen sentosa with dat nurul...
last min planning....
all the credit goes to her....
long time nvr wen there...
for once i got to do stupid things...
hehehehe....
had lunch infrnt of the beach....
with the sun just rite infornt of us....
pretty damn hot n burning but yet enduring....
camwhoring here n dere...
damn fun.....
enjoyed de dae eventhough im supposed to spend it with him...

up next was the sunday...
wen out with sistas n bro-in-law plus bf...
5 of us was like spending time...
choosing 1 pink digital camera....
oh well...
the camera was 1 of my choices of bdae present dis year...
nice but yeah...
mine is nicer... =)

as for today,
met him for dinner...
n he bought me a teddy bear...
his name is GONDOL....
love it so much...
GOBLIN, MATREP, COOKIE MONSTER, MR SMILEY & GONDOL....
hahahaha...
cool....

thats all for now...
i wish i cud be with him forever,..
love u lots sayang...
muacks...

2009-11-25T12:58:00.002+08:00

been a very long time since i blog abt things that had happened....
mayb that's no time to even mit up with fwns and bf,...
having involve with expo sales was fun...
being able to mit up with different people....
with different culture and wae of thing....
hmmm....
interesting yet irritating....
dat's working life....

doned with expo n back to store...
really miss my office and the people there....
was really glad that things have ended....
next will be xmas celebration promotions....
tons of things to do i guess...
hahahaha.....
hope so if nt i'll be rotting in the office ....

i miss bestie....
miss her till i cried alone in my room...
just cnt believe she really means so much to me....
been thru so much together....
i noe she have a own life now...
and i'll alwaes pray for the best for her....
luv u girl....

next up will be the rp peeps...
outing this sat that i s not really cnfrm though....
i miss them too....
my dear haira u're been miss my ur sis dear....
hopefully the outing will be on...
ezzah thanx for making me laugh for the whole nite...
really enjoy ur company....
mit up often ok with daddy too...
i miss daddy oso cn...
heheheh.....

nurul....
just be patience ok...
he'll be out sooner or later....
time will flies fast w/o u realising it....
trust me it will...
for now just enjoy the moments....
dun spoilt or destroy ur life bcuz of this...
b de nurul dat i've been with for the whole 3 yrs in poly...
i still have me if u nid someone orites...

something is wrong that's gonna happen...
i'm just so scared to think about it...
i wonder why must it alwaes happen...
will it like affect the relationship that im having now...
y cnt i just have a r/s that is simple and straight forward.,,,
im just tired of all the complication that been taking place...
simply cnt make any decision for now...
brain dead....
can i just run away from all this...

i just wish that i cud live a life with just bf...
w/o any interferences....
it wud be better....
for u n me....
forever...
hais...

kuimpikan mimpi yang sempurna dari mu.....

2009-09-21T22:46:00.002+08:00

frustrated, irritated, annoyed....
feel like puching the wall...
arrrgghhhh....
y must all this happen....
tried very hard to be nice...
not throwing temper n all....
but i just feel that its too much....
everytime this happens...
i just breakdown & cry...
nth else that i could do...
haaisss..........

i wan to run far far far far away............

2009-09-19T02:12:00.002+08:00

it's already 2am in the morning n yet im nt aslp...
suprisingly i dun feel slpy like hw i use too...
kinda off wierd but just cnt be bothered to think abt it...
miss the time wen u hold me tite...
spending time like there's no tmr...
joking n teasing each other...
talking on the fone till morning...
all this left only as memories for me...
things changes as people change...
not complaining...
just saying...

last day of fasting n raya is coming.,.
arent excited for that...
dun noe y but yah...
the feeling is just so wierd...
cnt explain it at all....

wen popeye for last buka session with the girls...
at last i got to mit up with haira...
miss her alot2....
had ben&jerry for after that...
cool or wat.....
hopefully this yr jln raya will go on smoothly as planned...
looking forward to mit everyone back like how we use to...

wat a dae...
injurd my toe for some reason...
n its bleeding and painful...
cian faeza....
hais...

will update the pictures in facebook wen i feel like updating it...

2009-09-17T00:30:00.002+08:00

feeling quite dissapointing for now....
application for school was successful...
however money will alwaes be the main issue...
how i wish all this problems wun happen to me...
just wanna study as much as i can n be someone...
achieving what i've been dreaming for...

day by day the stressness is increasing....
feeling like things wun happen the wae i've planned...
trying very hard to make things right...
hoping for the best as possible...

to people who have been helping me...
just wanna say thank you so the very much...
greatly appreciated and i love u guys....

not looking forward to hari raya....
sadness....

2009-09-07T22:38:00.000+08:00

lots of things have been taking place around me..
happy or sad...
it just happen as planned by fate...
there's things that I've pick up along the way...
learning how to give n take...
learn how to accept things that i should...
haix....
this is all the matter of time...
that could change things....
for the better...

2009-08-30T14:14:00.000+08:00

so frustrated with everything....
what is f**king wrong with me ...
argghhh!!!!
everything seems to be wrong somewhere...
just need someone to be here with me...
making me feel better....
telling me nth is going to be wrong...
hais...

met him at last ytd...
at ard afternoon...
headed to vivo for a movie...
preety akward at first...
been sometime wen couples dun mit & call...
this is wat happen...
frankly speaking i really miss him badly...
feel like hugging him wen i first met him...
telling him how much i miss him...
holding his hand very thight...
that's wat i feel like doing...
but wat i did was a different thing....
feeling like miting a stranger...
someone that i've not met for sometime...
silence was occupying the atmosphere...
since the journey started till it ends...
very wierd to have that happening when i miss him...
the moment wen u holds my hands...
i feels like crying inside....
the moment u hug me...
i just wan to cut it short...
dun wan to depend on u dat much...

i just dun understand what's happening in my life now...
freaking lost in a middle of nowhere...
where nothing can be found...
nothing is right....
u may wan me to accpt everything ...
not to complain things to u...
even if im just clarifying things...
to u it's just plainly complaining....

supposed to get ready to mit eza n wan for breakfast...
but i'm still here not ready at all...
dun feel like going but i nid some entertainments...
to let my mind rest from problems dat kept myself down...

wen cn this ever ends...
happiness taking over...
miracle happens....
i wish.....

2009-08-28T22:55:00.000+08:00

work was superb the slack today...
boss isnt there...
thus everything was peaceful...
tmr will be a day with her alone...
this is gonna be bored for me...
she's just simple fun to talk with..
just that i cnt be bothered to entertain...
haha...

met nurul n ezzah after werk...
wen to smu n den to YMCA...
at last i register for my degree...
all thanks to my two dear girls as alwaes...
hahah... ezzah u are 1 funny girl...
mcm paham look mature but padahal the youngest...
sayang kamu many2....
betul... betul... betul...
hope this will just goes smoothly as planned...
NOV will be the month skool will start for me...
yeay!!! i miss skool....

kinda of wierd to be going for class for minimum 1 day per month...
hahaha...
like play2 like dat....
but assigments will be very tough as usual...
oh well...
just cant wait for NOV to come....
then i'll be starting to feel the stressness...
2 module per semester....
insyallah boleh....
amin....

shud i be waiting for your messages everytime...
or shud i just let it be....
pretending is wat i'm alwaes do...
lying is taking place...
eversince urent here..

hate empty words...
is the same as not saying...
better to keep den hurting people...
be it u or her or him or you...
everyone are all the same..
refect on yourself...

2009-08-27T23:18:00.000+08:00

waiting n waiting n waiting n waiting....
that's the things i've been doing...
sitting down counting the stars...
knowning that it's just uncountable...

wishing that something wud happen by chance...
something good that brings out happiness...
but yet it not taking place any sooner...
just a wish that i have in mind...
to make myself feel better...

2009-08-24T22:58:00.000+08:00

while waiting for him to wash up...
decided to blog....
but nth is in my mind now...

just thinking whether i shud do apply for skul this year or nt...
really wanna go study back rather than starting to werk...
arent ready for a proper working environment now...
no doubt i've been working permanently for almost 1 yrs...
it's just so bored to do things the same again n again...

tmr n weds will be a bored dae...
i'll be alone werking with my boss...
can time pass faster so i can meet you..
can i.. can i... can i....

2009-08-23T12:14:00.000+08:00

waiting for time to bath...
tinking abt things that have been taking place...
it's just so unpredictable...
i'm so actionless....
dying inside....

by all means u can be mad at me..
i noe im alwaes in the wrong when things bcome like this..
crying inside alone is just wat i could do...

every nite i'll wait for you..
having this mindset that u'll haf time for me..
even just awhile...
sometime its dissapointments but sometime it's happness...
i noe that u're bz with ur life now...
i'm sorry if i'm a burden to u...
cnt affort not to complain that u're nt there for me..
it's hard for me...
but i've tried not to complain that much...
however the loneliness is still there...
lying to myself is wat i alwaes do..
even u noe that....
coz i'm doing this all for u...
i dun wan to quarrel with u...
coz i love u...

faeza is not here for the time being.....

2009-08-19T22:43:00.000+08:00

faeza nye blog sooo damn dead....
coz she's dead too nowadaes....
hahaha...
not literally dead bt emotionally...

was supposed to go running but bro in law came...
so tk jadi n nw mendaking in the room....
hmmm.... wat shall i sae.....
i miss my rp peeps especially my 2 abgs....
fasting dae is coming really really soon....
so de fast lor....
n i'm left with a few weeks to spend time with wan....
all are in NS and it's like so boredness....
how i wish that i can slower the time...
so he'll go NS abit later....
hais....

wen out with the Kranji girls that day....
was so damn KECOH wen met them....
everyone was like so happening xcept me...
hahaha...
kind of no mood....
but thanks to bestie that really understand me...
i'm sorry if im so emotionally down...
didnt meant to prangai or wat that day...
hope u do understand my situation...
to dee thanks for dropping by to mit me even for a short time...
appreciate it to the extend....

this week is the most boring week...
everydae must work....
sianx le....
but today wen dinner with wan....
thank for making my dae better...
n sorry if im alwaes late...
heheh..

i wanna watch movie can??
hais....
but watch wif who?
so the sian lor....
haiyooooo...
i just with that everything will be fine...
but will it be...??
i wonder....

there's where she stop...

HAPPY 21st BIRTHDAY TO FARHANA ARIS

2009-08-02T12:12:00.000+08:00

today's bestie 21 birthday....
now ure 1 yrs older...wahahah....
hope u enjoy ur dae big day...
love u so much farhana aris..
muackss!!!

things was hell for the past few weeks....
i wish that someone is there to comfort me...
like how it use to be but not now....
kept me wondering why things turns this way...
very complicated and unpredictable...
even for me...
cant even find the answer to the questions at all...
wen i asked you simply say nothing, maybe, dun noe...
whats more can i do to make things running in the r/s..??
that's always the question i have in mind when things goes wrong..
hais....

i wanna have fun in life....
like how i use to be...
with u by myside always...
nothing goes wrong at all...
can dat possibly happen again...
i doubt so...

fasting month is ard the corner...
hope that something good will happen...
a small girl is making a wish....

2009-07-30T22:46:00.000+08:00

currently feeling very lost....
confusion and complication...
everything in my mind...
i lost everything...
incomplete....

something that i wanna sae..
but this song will do the job....

Waiting for your call, I'm sick, call I'm angry
Call I'm desperate for your voice
Listening to the song we used to sing
In the car, do you remember
Butterfly, Early Summer
It's playing on repeat, Just like when we would meet

I was born to tell you I love you
And I am torn to do what I have to, to make you mine
Stay with me tonight

Stripped and polished, I am new, I am fresh
I am feeling so ambitious, you and me, flesh to flesh
Because every breath that you will take
when you are sitting next to me
will bring life into my deepest hopes, What's your fantasy?
What's your...

I was born to tell you I love you
And I am torn to do what I have to, to make you mine
Stay with me tonight

And I'm tired of being all alone, and this solitary moment makes me want to come back home
x4
(I know everything you wanted isn't anything you have)

I was born to tell you I love you
And I am torn to do what I have to, to make you mine
Stay with me tonight

I was born to tell you I love you
And I am torn to do what I have to, to make you mine
Stay with me tonight
(I know everything you wanted isn't anything you have)

things alwaes happen for some reasons...
n i really hope that mine happen for a good reason...
before ending i just wanna sae that i love u....
thank you for being a loving part of my life...
i pray that the story will not end just like dat...

2009-07-25T23:09:00.000+08:00

wen i sit back....
staring at the empty air....
is the same thing as my life....
empty without anithing to complete it....
no doubt u're busy with things...
understandable....
for once think about me...
dat's all i ask from you...

two wks w/o u was a change...
busy is alwaes the reason...
its hard for me....
lying to myself..
treating things goes smoothly....
thanks to people who make me laugh & all...
but in my heart dat's only you dat will alwaes make my dae...

2009-07-19T00:48:00.002+08:00

moments of RP life was refreshed...
with all those old jokes back then in school....
laughter of the crazy people....
miss those daes.....
met up with brother bear at bugis....
had lunch after 2hrs of walking and shopping.....
been a long time since i mit him and lepak....
share stories and commenting on people....
refreshing all the momories back then....
really fun doing that with him....
feel like the old daes where we'll talk everydae....
cute yet memoriable moments....
met up with wan after that n make our wae to esplanade...
watch the fireworks....
it was cool....
but crowded with mats & minahs.....
had dinner together and cont' talking and joking....
laughter fills up the atmosphere around me...
really feel that i'm just being myself back den in school...
i just miss being ME.....
took videos and pictures but will update it on FB....
wen im rajin to upload....
hehehe....
till here....
bye...

2009-07-12T23:08:00.003+08:00

complicated life....
just too hard to explain....
may never noe wat's gonna happen next...
confusing.....
lost...

leading life as normal....
working in the dae....
tuition in the nite...
just wish that life can be better then this...

looking 4ward to mit up with nurul n eza...
gonna watch fireworks....
confirm lots of minahz n matrepz....
oh well...
since he's not coming out 4 2 weeks....
spending most of the time with these crazy ppl....
hope that it'll be fun after all...

cant wait for IT show.....

taking care people....

ps: looking forward to mit u up bestie...

2009-07-09T22:37:00.006+08:00

1 Years has past behind us....
been overcoming mountains together....
be it the hard way or the easy way....
that's part n parcel of relationships..

no doubts tons n tons of things had been happening....
unexpectable things was seen....
how bad u are n watever it is it will never stop me frm loving you...
just hope that u will understand me better....
dun stop loving me as long as u live....
coz i wun....

100708 was the meaningful day for us....
the day that only mean for us....
time where we spend time....
good times n bad times...
it's just happened but...
please dun gif up...
on US...

really hope that u'll change for the better....
please dun break your promises....
control ur temper....
dun hurt me anymore....
pleaseeee...
ily Jumalee.... =P

happy 1yr aniversary sayang...
may everythings runs smoothly for us....
amin...

btw i miss bestie...
n nurul...
n abg....
n yana....
n everyone that i noe....
i miss you guys....
taking care...

2009-07-05T23:35:00.002+08:00

the rain show how hurt i was....
dun really noe y it happen but yet it happen...
confused alone in the middle of noe where....
finding the right path to the right route...
i noe i'm not gud enuf for you but i did the best for you...

every single moments ure nt with me....
the feeling of incomplete grows stronger n stronger....
dun noe how im going to handle it....
sobx.....

2009-07-03T23:32:00.002+08:00

feeling a sense of love, care n attention....
isnt there anymore....
be it u nor him...
it's the same...
as long as u're happy...
i'm happy too....
coz i care n love both of you....

i'm so lost... hais.....

I'M SORRY BESTIE...

2009-06-14T00:11:00.002+08:00

i wan to apologies to u...
i noe i was wrong...
jumping to conclsion...
make u feel sad and all...
was totally stress out with things....
emotional unstable...
was very egoistic at that time...
hais....
i was just tired of all the things that's happening ard me...
mayb wat u sae is rite just that i choose nt to accpt it...
it's kind of hard coz i'm nt use to it....
gif me time to accpt all this...
i miss you....

2009-06-09T23:17:00.002+08:00

one mountain after another ....
it just wun stop cuming .....
making me so weak...
hopeless....
sobx...

i dun noe why must all this end u like this....
history is starting to repeat itself again...
'time off' that's the most phrase i hate....
sobx2...

will past repeat again....??
ohh god please dun.....

2009-06-07T12:56:00.002+08:00

things doesnt goes smoothly as planned....
it just happenned for some reason...
wat i haf wud b mine forever...
every min, every sec....
somehow it'll be gone...
forever....
hais..
adapting with things in life that kept changing every moments.....
everythings is changing....
people and places....
maybe heart....
L.O.V.E....

bisikan hati...
i wanna be with you.....
please dun walk away.....
someday somehow u'll understand....

confusion....

2009-06-04T22:14:00.002+08:00

long time since i updated.....
kind of no time for all this...
starting to feel bored with life...
going thru same things again n again....
living in a world with full of lies....
but there's hope dat i hope for....
to find the star to shine my waes.......
hais.....

been 4 months working there and i'm starting to get bored...
doing things over n over again....
no doubt dat i love my senior alot....
alwaes there for me wen i'm bored with things....
but till wen will i b stuck doing things that make me feel boreddd???
another question that is in my mind dae by daes....

i miss my fwns....
people whu alwaes complete my daes...
with laughter n joy....
without fail.....
can i just rewind back my poly life....
sobx2....

since i lost my hp......
i lost all the contacts ....
saded....
do update ur numbers with me alrites....
taking care people....
muacks.....

foRt canNing/ hp lost

2009-05-24T10:10:00.003+08:00

another side of fort canning was nice......
but full of nyamuk....
bite me like nobodys business....
took lots n lots n lots of pictures...
damn fun but tiring coz there's alot of stairs to b climb....
found a new fwn.....
hahaha.....

apart from the happy moments was the sad story..
lost my fav hp....
dun noe where it have gone to....
sob2...
all tanx to my carelessness....
never lost my fone b4 n this is the first time...
pasrah nyeeeee.....
saded.....

after which had dinner at cwp....
had ban mian for sure....
craving for that for a very long time....
syiok sia de ban mian.....
hmmmm.....
hahaha....
wen lepak with sayang at the mrt station dere....
tookk pic again as usual....
after which wen back home coz tired liao....

it the feeling that something that seems to be different...
kind of wierd but dat's wat i feel about us now....
barriers that kip us apart somehow....
mayb u just dun understand it....
how am i supposed to let u noe wat's always in my mind....
wen u just cnt understand it....
hais.....

Birthday count down...

2009-05-20T23:12:00.002+08:00

30 mins to go....
turning 21 years old...
yet doesnt look like...
cool or wat....
maintain small kid as usual...

tmr will be the dae where i shud enjoy....
every minutes every seconds of the moments....
ending werk at ard 4pm & off for tuition...
miting bestie n maria at orchard...
weeeee!!!!!!!
gonna enjoy myself wif them....
btw tanx dear bestie for planning smth 4 me...
lurp u so many many many more....

so touch that even my grandmother wish me advance bdae wish....
love u nenek.... mucksss!!!

now doing nth else other then blogging and msning n facebooking....
i'm sooooo de boredddd.....
waiting for the minutes n seconds to come...
wishes my bdae wish before going to bed....
hoping that it will come thru one dae...
i wish i wish i wish very hard hard hard....

am i being so unreasonable towards u all these while???
all i wanted is just u to gif me the attention, love n care....
dat's all i ask for from u....
is that so much for u to gif it to me??
just dun get it...
y must things just happen like this...
trying very hard to make things better...
but somehow it just cant happen just as planned....
wat dat have gone wrong .....
just cnt figure it out on my own frm that moments things go haywire...
wierd but yet it does happen....

just so hard to accpt the fact...
all i noe is just to run from problems....
till wen will i be stop running from all these...
wat will happen next if that were to happen???
wait n let the time do the job.....

gd nite people.....
have a nice dae......

2009-05-19T21:18:00.002+08:00

HE's BACK!!!!
by my side alwaes....

i noe i dissappoint u.....
xcpting more den wat dat happen...
tried to make things more fun but i fail...
regret to make u walked so long.....
regret for demanding on dat stuppid fone....
it just made me so terribly down....
looking at face like dat...
make me cry inside...
wanting 2 met u was the priorty wen u cum back....
not like wat happen on the day....
breaking down infront of bestie was embarrassing.....
trying to control but just cnt hold it any longer....
btw tanx bestie for being dere for me....
now den u noe how hard things goes for me...
watever u saes are ur point of view....
i dun ask much from u...
just ur care n concern dat will make different in my life....
i love u as much as i love jumalee.....
both of u means so much to me....
i dun wan 2 loose ani1 of u...

being unreasonable is just happen without knowing it....
but am i???
u tried to make me be an independent person but fail...
reason being i dun wan to be 1....
used to be like dis...
being around people that love me, care and being pampared....
that me....
hope u understand me....

i miss you sayang....
no matter wat happen,
u'll be alwaes in my heart...
that's the promise i've made...
how mad i am towards u,
how sad i am,
i still love u alot....

2009-05-13T22:18:00.002+08:00

sOre thRoat dae....
was supposed to go to work but cudnt force myself up....
feeling so sick and pain.....
all thanxs 2 whu ever dat pass it to me...
went to collect mc and medicine....
wanna sae thanx to NURUL for the company....
had an early tuition with Insyirah....
math was fun 4 me but not her...
hope that she'll do well 4 tmr's paper...
please dun dissapoint me n ur mum.......

3 more daes to see him back in SINGAPORE....
so am i excited for that???
dun really noe wat's the answer to that question...
no doubt that it wasnt complete without him around...
mayb just starting to get use to being around others n not him....
hopefully the feeling of awkard wont exist by then....

feel happy for him for enduring 24 daes to complete the camp....
at last it's going to an end.....
after all the hard work that have been done all these while....
shud have some celebration with him...
hopefully he love it.....
imy daydee... =(

21 may will be the day for small girl to turn 21 years old....
the day that i hope that it will be as memorable as last year....
being around both bestie and hopefully dear boy....
hoping to enjoy every single moments in life....
taking care people...
tata....

2009-05-09T09:40:00.002+08:00

woke up in the morning....
feeling a little lost....
kinda of wierd...
missing ....
haiss...

1 wk 2 go and he's back....
hope everything goes smoothly...
not really counting down but just ...
getting bored days after days.....
i wish i can turn back time...
having fun time.....
smiling always...
but not now...
lying to myself....
running away from things....
when will all this feeling stop....
may look happy but the fact i'm not...

so happy for bestie....
at last being wif someone...
someone that she love alot...
wishing u all the best in ur r/s....
i bet u wun have so much prob than me...
i mit u later alrite dear....

working is so getting bored nowadaes....
doing same old things again and again....
considering of changing job but nt nw....
enduring for a few months more to go...

dun feel excited at all for my bdae dis yr....
kind of wierd coz it's really not me....
i dun noe y but dat's the feeling that i feel now...
only looking 4ward for bestie surprise that she made 4 me...
other then that it's just a normal dae....

guess that's all for now....
will update soon if that's feeling to update....
take care people...

review of this week

2009-05-03T13:23:00.002+08:00

1 month w/o him was abit wierd....
doing this without him by myside....
ohh welll....

wkdaes was pretty normal routine....
work den tuition den home....
wkends was slightly different...
wen to cut my hair....
mit up wif bestie...
have some toking session at mac...
off to orchard with bestie, sisters and bro in law....
had lots of laughting here n dere....
once i can make my mind at peace.....
enjoying the outing with them...
bought sis the agnes b bag....
nice la but the accessories is more nicer...
n i bought 1 tooo....
wahahaha....
had dinner after a long walking....
wen pizzahut at lucky plaza....
damn full and tired of non stop laughing....
how i wish that this can happen everydae....
the closeness of the siblings and families....
hais.....

10 daes have past and 14 daes to go....
really miss him alot.....
waiting for that 14 daes to past is so long....
hope to mit him 1st thing wen he come back....
hais...

18 daes to gooo.....
wishing for suprises to happen....
will dat wish of mine come true???
taking care people....
imy sayang.... =(

2009-04-26T15:36:00.002+08:00

20 daes to goo n dats is super duper long....
can it just fly faster....
the day wen i send him was the sadening dae for us...
24 daes without eacch other....
no calls, no msgs, outing, dating,.....
but appreciate him for his effort to call and msg me....

been making my daes as pack as possible....
trying to make myself happy....
btw thanks to farhana aris for the company all this while....
appreciate it alot and ur milo oso.... =P
take care people....

2009-04-10T23:34:00.002+08:00

happy 9 month aniversary to US...
been a long time since the day i met him....
till now all the things that we've been through...
ups and downs in this relationship taught me alot...
i hope and wish that we'll stay together forever & ever...
btw thank for the cookie monster soft toy that you gave me...
i love it as much as i love matrep and goblin but i love u even more....
wen Ehub to catch Knowing after my long dae tuition....
was kinda lost watching that movie evnthought i didnt slp during the show....
hahaha... forever lost kid....

talking about going overseas....
just hate to hear about it...
afew more weeks and he's off....
somewhere far from me...
am i prepared for that....
3 wks without anitin from him is ridicules....
totally got no answer wen he ask what am i going to do 4 dat 3 wks...
i myself dont have the answer to that question...
what can i do when he's not here with me....
i'm soory for giving u that answer....
i'm just not prepared.....
aniwae i dun mean what i said....
trying not to even think about it....

u'll alwaes be in my heart sayang.....

2009-04-08T22:07:00.002+08:00

Officially graduated with a DIPLOMA in Biomedical Electronic Engineering.....
sound so WoW but basically the same as the rest just that it' like a rojak 2 me....
was so nervous when going up the stage....
my sis say i look like cartoon ....
so damn the not me .....
stage fright......
hahaha....
took lots2 of pictures with all the peEps that i Know....
going round and round and round to find people to take picture with....
wahahahaha....
gonna miss POLY life with all those crazy and sweet people that i've known....
food was so2 onli but the pizza and fishball was the best....
tiring wearing the heels for like half a day......
cant imagine if i were to wear it for like whole day.....
tsk tsk.....

went Sweensen with sis and mummy....
had lucnch coz very the hungry....
and off to grandma house while i went home....
met nurul & Ezzah after that for some dinner and rounding2....
however something unpredictable happenned but good thing not that serious...
still i'm sooo damn scared...
overall i enjoy the outing with those 2 girls..... *winks*

cant wait for tomorrow coz hubby is booking out.....
hopefully that's confirm coz i really the miss him alot.....
so damn appreciate that he msg me when having his camp....
i wish he know how much i miss him and will miss him when he's not here...
thailand trip is around the corner....
that means that i'm left behind alone without him by my side....
almost 1 month without him is like hais.....
dun noe whether i'll be alright with that later or not....
1 month is very long and i'm left with nothing but only his L.O.V.E in my heart....
*crying*

had 1 wish for my birthday in 1 month plus....
hopefully it will come true......
*close my eyes*
i wish i wish.....
please make my wish come true....

i'm off....

2009-04-02T22:04:00.002+08:00

been a long working dae as usual....
werking and off for tuition is just my routine...
sometime im just sick and tired of all this things....
i wanna be somewhere peace and calm....
where all the problems will be gone....
tinking too much can make me go sick...
i wish someone will eventually come...
bring back the old happy2 me....
haixx.....

did i take the right move???
did i do it right??
if nt what is wrong???
i'm totally lost....
here alone....
sobx2.... :(

2009-03-29T21:32:00.002+08:00

last dae to spend time with hubby....
nxt dating will be 2 wks from now...
cnt believe that & i tot he's joking but nope....
i'll miss him badly for that 2 weeks....
april is coming and time is coming closer & closer....
cnt imagine 1 month w/o him is like haissss....
thailand is far den pasir laba camp....
this is nitemare...
boohoohooo....

last few days was hubby's birthday....
he's old by 1 yrs by now....
didnt really celebrate on the day of his birthday...
but did that celebration belatedly...
for that 3 daes he's out from camp we went out...
shopping, catch movie, spending time with him...
hope he love the present that he wanted all this while....
today went to have oreocheese cake with him....
i hope u like it althought it doesnt really look like a proper birthday cake...

working life is so much boring than school life....
more stress and pressure at workplace...
different environment, different people......
not even ready for this life.....
i really hope that i can continue schooling and take my degree....

i wish i wish....

2009-03-17T22:21:00.002+08:00

was suprised to receive msges from them....
i hope your're strong to face reality in life....
enjoy ur life before going in a few wks time i guess...
glad that you have change & realise things that happen in the past...
i wish you all the best....

sayang having 24hr guard duty & no time 4 me....
i'm so damn bored plus nurul is not here to tok 2 me....
so the not use to the boringness in life....
i miss you alot dear...
book out faster can pleaseeee......

working is fun nowaday for me....
just that i get slpy easily ....
no1 entertaining me...
all're gone to Expo...
left me alone...
boohoo...

now i wanna buy itouch....
i wan i wan....
saving for the next few months till jun or july expo sales again....
weeee!!!
i wanna change hp le but daydEe dun let me....
but i'll still wanna it ....
hehehe....

fana is so damn clever la....
grade so damn good....
how i wish i'm as clever as her...
hais....
i miss you la....
wen can i possibble met you...??

2009-03-09T13:45:00.002+08:00

just msning him for de past half n hour.....(i guess...)
lots of things happen when the time we're close till we're nt....
going our seperate waes was the best solution and dat was the past....
nvr did i mention dat he's not good or anitin....
never did i regret being wif him....
been thru those time was a memory dat shall be kept as memory....
i hope ure happy wif her and get to fulfill ur hajat before entering NS ....

atok just pass away this morning....
was suprised by dat new by my aunty....
didnt tot of that incident to happen so sudden...
may he rest in peace.....

i miss my sayang nw...
he's having urban war fare....
while i'm at home missing him....
staring at the empty air think of him...
wondering what will happen next for us...
hoping for the best of coz....
i love u jumalee.....

10 of every month will be the dae i'll alwaes remember...
de dae where he let those words out from his mouth.... (but his is msg)
stating that he love me and want us to go far not just a friend....
status was wat we're lacking of but it doesnt even matter....
wat's important is the bond that we have was dere....
and i hope that we'll go far as wat we've plan for...
tmr will be the dae that will tell us how long we've been together...
as a stranger, a friend, a boyfriend and in future.... insyallah....

i'm off.....

2009-03-01T22:26:00.002+08:00

been 1 weeks since im starting working full time. lots of things that i've been learning and have to learn. hard time, fun time, play time all in one day. it's fun being the youngest in department as i'll get the most attentions and help from them. hehehss...

febuary have ended and march have begin. lost of things that's gonna happen. insyirah is gonna have exam soon and i really hope that she do well. i'll pray for u. suprisingly this months, there's a few people's burfdae. that's sux. but the important date is his. turning 21 in mar 25 2009. wanna suprise him if something that will make him remember foreva. just wanna be a good girlfwn to him. doing something good to make him happy.

no doubt we've been having a hard time recently but that dont meant that we dont love each other. that's life in relationship. not complete without ups and down in life.

2009-02-22T22:25:00.002+08:00

upDating mY pOOr bloG...
hmmmm....
started my full time job on last fri....
was interesting yet boring though.....
do some typing here and there plus cutting papers...
goshhh!!!! i hate printing signages coz damn slow la till can fall asleep...
overall it was fun to learn new things plus i'm soo damn nice to do OT on the 1st dae...
waHahaha...

after which wen to mit my SaYang at Jurong Point....
he's so damn slow la mcm tortise...
waited n waited but tk sampai2...
tanx to my NUrul coz she accompanied me...
wen for dinner and bLa bLa bLA....

sAt was fun to a certain part only....
had tuition at 10 am but i'm late as usual...
supposed to met sAyang at MRT statIon but i was late ...
so swit of him to walk towards where i'm heading just to pick me up...
watch movie i'm not into you at CWP....
so romantic la de story but NuruL u really nid 2 watch it....
wen to mit nurul up at cineleisure coz she was having a date wif hmm...
but end up onli mit at lucky plaza....
played pool for 2 hrs and it was funnnn...
sayang really good at playing pool...
something dnt really goes smoothly but shall not sae it....

was quite upset about it till now....
breaking down was the 1st things that took place....
i dun noe why but i just dont like....
y cnt u just understand it???
sometime i feel that i'm not good enuf 4 u....
dun noe when will things be just fine again like hw it use to be...
hais....

busy wif work and tuition lately....
forcing myslf to be busy....
wkdaes is not fun w/o sayang....
i wish i wish to have a good wkends wif him...

taking care peepsss....

p.s : LEADER!! get well soon orites.... miss ya....

2009-02-06T00:13:00.002+08:00

back to update about life....

been working all the way since the day school ended....
poly life is ending and to be exact have already ended....
gonna miss those times wif that crazy bunch of people.....
pLaying, gossiping, caboTing, sLacking, chit -chatting,....
time flies rEaLLy fast......

pLenty2 of things have beEn taKing plaCE in mY liFe.....
pEople cOme and peOple gO.....
daT's liFE.....
reAlly aPPreciate for all tHose meMories daT was lEft behiNd.....
bUT i wIsh daT dIs one pErsOn woNT leaVe mY liFE....
becAuse i LOVE hIm.....

searching for job is totally hell lots of no fUn....
irritating when u apply but no reply from them...
just hope dat i get this admin job at robinson la....
pray for me okie....

hmmmm......
i'm sssooo damn bored today....
nth to do and no one 2 talk 2....
goshhh...

stop here now....
cont other daes.....
taking care pEeps...

2009-01-08T10:20:00.002+08:00

dAes gEtting cLoser aNd clOser....
not eveN pRepAred for it...
tOtaLLi fREakIn oUt...
geTtiNg iT doNe anD over wiTh...
eNjoy de rEst of the DaEs iN pOly....
wIsh mE lUck foR dIs weDs pResenTatioN....

aM i dOIng de RigHT thIngs alL thIS while....
iGnoRing and iGnoRing waT's hAppeNing....
sCaREd to b hUrt and tO hUrt oTHers...
esPeciaLLy mY jUmaLEe....
hais..

woW!!! tiME reallY flieS daMn fasT ...
bEen togetHer for alMOst 6mThs...
alhAmdulIlLah.....
i hOpe wE'LL lasT foRevEr....
reAsoN beIng i lOve hIm aLOt....
mUcKS.....

p.s. : i mIss my FArhaNa AriS....

2008-12-14T23:54:00.003+08:00

i'm sorry if i made u feel mad or angry....
i noe i'll never fail to make u feel angry ......
but deep down my heart my L.O.V.E for you stays.....
no matter wat happen in the future....
you're my heart and soul.....
i L.O.V.E you.....
jumalee....

hols have started and here i am werking always.....
now i miss going to school.....
classroom filled with laughter of the crazy classmates....
facilitators voice trying to teach us....
long winded 6Ps....
lets take a break till 5 jan next year.....
school reopen with a new year.....
may i'll be rajin to go for lesson....

in a mood of going to the beach....
where the atmosphere is so peace....
the surrounding is cooling....
night wind breeze.....
the sound of the wave from the sea....
taking away all the problems temporary....
enjoy the moment that is so peace and calm....

jumalee...
i'll never stop loving you....
just let time do its job now.....
nth can be done xcept waiting....
get well soon sayang.....
i love you ......
alwaes.....
<3

2008-12-14T00:42:00.002+08:00

faeza is lost and nid to find her way back.....
to a place where things goes well enuf....
for her to do soul search....

oh please dun break down now....

sobx2.... =(

tiRed afTer wOrk...

2008-12-14T00:13:00.002+08:00

sometime i wonder y must things turn tis wae.....
y cnt dey happen like wat we haf plan before hand....
people saes day arguements is part of it in a relationship...
its and obstacles that will strengthen the relationship that we had...
however too much arguements is frustrating and irritating and hurting...

everytime things goes wrong i'll be wondering.....
what did i do or say wrongly....
did i hurt your feelings.....
am i not listening to u...
thousands and millions of questions coming to my mind.....
but none of the questions had the answer to the questions.....
i wonder why......

keeping quite isnt going to solve things up....
yet it will keep building up dae by day as time flies....
saying it out is something that is healthy to do ....
but its outcome might not be as good.....
wat's left for me to do???
running away .....
dat's all is left in the choice....

life is alwaes unfair....
but we can alwaes make it fair if we want to...
people might think that i'm leading a good happy life...
but you are wrong totally.....
life is complicated....
and it will alwaes b complicated....

there's tons and tons of things that can be learn in life.....
depending on a person for attention that you dream for ....
leading life w/o problems.....
hoping to be pamper .....
to be loVe fuLly.....
by your love oneS.....
sometime it's just a big DREAM that might not come true....
how hard or smart you try....
it wont cum true.....
mayb it will.....
mayb nt....
hais....

2008-12-02T09:35:00.004+08:00

i'm in the hols mood now eventhough haven hols yet....
dEe goNna scold me if i kip skipping lesson again and againn...
i'm scared that 1 of my module sangkut...
oh god pleasee help me....
hope that for my elective UT 3 my grade will be at least a C+...
if i get another E i'm dead meat....
another module is that medical tech....
i hate it alot...
2 ut get D and i really hope that I get a C+ or B for 3rd UT....
if not i'm dead for the 2nd time...
thanx god my imaging and equipment is stabil...
hopefully i can get B+ or C for overall grade for that 2 modules.....

dEe is gOnna POP in 8 more days time....
i'm so happy and can't wait for that day to come...
i wanna spend my time with him....
but i'm gonna haf to work tooo...
time planning is important....
i wan to watch movie....

i'm soory if i did something wrong that day...
till you hate yourself badly.,..
i shudnt haf told you that i'll merajok if you never sent me back....
hais... i really hope that you will be ok with her soon...

1 month left to 2009...
counting down...

2008-11-24T20:43:00.010+08:00

to believe or not it's up to you but atually i cook for lunch today at home with nurul...hahaha...

so damn random... was really tired and so we skip lesson... came to my house and lepak...

at first i tot of going out and have lunch but since at home might as well cook and eat at home...

saving sikit.. so there's a few dishes that we atually cook today... sweet n sour prawn, fried cabbage, fried can sotong and lastly fried drumlet... ate all this dishes with RICE... since a long time that i didnt cooking food... will update the pictures at the end of the entry..

wen to Lot 1 for a walk to waste time actually... while walking i saw this shop and it sell this cute containers... i love it soo much and there's a frog container too... so decided to buy 1 for me and 1 for myself.... nurul bought her someone tooo.... hehehe... was so happy coz it's damn cute.....

when to had a light dinner with nurul at Ljs.... after that off back home... tmr must go school... if not i'm dead meat....

was supposed to update ytd about the day dEe book in.... he was the IC for that day.... so kental but i'm proud of him though.... but i cant really talk to him coz he's doing his job as an ic....

ohhhh wellll.... his platoon mate was funny when they say like i'm the overall incharge or something.... reason being i was standing infront looking at them... so damn paiseh lor but i dun mind coz i know most of them.... only cant remember all their names... heheh....

ohhh yah.... i just wanna say i'm soooo sorry for being mad and merajoking at you all this while..

i have my own reason and i hope that you try and understand me too orites.... iLy sayang....

still counting down to your POp.... 16 daes left including weekends....

pictures time.....

^ bAybEe and dAydEe ^

the dishes that was being cooked by me and nurul.......

^ sweet and sour prawn ^

^ fried can sotong ^

^ fried cabbage ^

^ fried drumlet ^

oritesss..... i'm done... will update soon.... now i'm waiting for my dEe's messages....have a great day peepS.... Take careeee..... tata.... :P

2008-11-18T12:50:00.002+08:00

Don't pretend you're sorry
I know you're not
You know you've got the power
To make me weak inside
And girl, you leave me breathless
But it's okayCuz you are my survival
Now hear me say

I can't imagine
Life without your love
And even forever
Don't seem like long enough

Every time I breathe I take you in
And my heart beats again
Baby, I can't help it
You keep me drowning in your love
Every time I try to rise above
I'm swept away by love
Baby, I can't help it
You keep me drowning in your love

Maybe I'm a drifter
Maybe not
Cause I have known the safety
Of floating freely in your arms
I don't need another life line
It's not for me
Cuz only you can save me
Oh, can't you see

I can't imagine
Life without your love
And even forever
Don't seem like long enough
(Don't seem like long enough yeah)

Every time I breathe I take you in
And my heart beats again
Baby, I can't help it
You keep me drowning in your love
Every time I try to rise above
I'm swept away by love
Baby, I can't help it
You keep me drowning in your love

Go on and pull me under
Cover me with dreams, yeah
Love me mouth to mouth now
You know I can't resist
Cuz you're the air that I breathe

Every time I breathe I take you in
(Cause every time I breathe yeah)
And, my heart beats again
Baby, I can't help it (baby I can't help it)
You keep me drowning in your love
And, every time I try to rise above
I'm swept away by love
Baby, I can't help it
You keep me drowning in your love (ooh, ooh)
Baby I can't help it
You keep me drowning in your love (got me drowning)
oh oh oh

You've got me drowning
You really got me drowning in your love

Baby, I can't help it
Can't help it oh no
(got me drowning)

Cause ever time I breathe I take you in (yes I do)
Then my heart beats again (Oh)
Baby, I can't help it (baby, I can't help it)
Keep me drowning in your love (oh no)
And every time I try to rise above (got me drowning)
I'm swept away by love
Baby, I can't help it
Keep me drowning in your love

dEe sang this song to me and it's so meaningful to me. i'm just so touched when he choose to sing that song to me. thank sayang and your voice is nice to me. SUMPAH tak tipu. hehe...i miss you a lot now a days. being emotional easily and all. getting jealous over something that i shouldnt be. i now i'm being silly that what you say but it's just a rare feeling that i have. like you always ask me whether i'm jealous over some girls and i aways say NO. but that time the feeling of jealousy was so random and i do get irritated over it. but i kept it to myself because i dont want to spoilt your happy mood. thus i prangai kat diri sendiri. it's abit difficult for me to get over that because somehow somewhere inside me there's a feeling of fear loosing you. i don't want to get hurt....

BMT is coming to an end for you sayang.but your other thing is coming up next. i shall not think about it now because i dont want to do something stupid that might unstablise our relationship. i'm starting to count down to the 10 DEC. that will be the most happiest day for me. knowing that you have completed your BMT that is 3 months minus the 2 years of NS. also our 5 months of being together. yeah2.!! after 10 DEC you are left with 1 yrs 9 mths of NS... insyallah we'll get to overcome this 2 years barrier together. i L.O.V.E you....

finishing my polytechnic life soon or shall i say 2 months plus left. that's include the holidays that we're going to have on the 13 DEc. 6 more problems to go and i'm done with diploma. weEeee!!! great or what... hehehhe!!! but i hope that i can continue my studies and take my degree by 2009 july. i'm scared.... but now the important things is that i have to chong for my FYP that is going to due soon. ohh god pleaseeee help me.....

i'm done with the updating i guess... i'll update more when i feel like updating... all the best to those who's taking IPPT this weds... Jia You to all!!!! love ya peeps... muacks!!!!

2008-11-14T12:27:00.002+08:00

dun feel good today....mayb because of the new team im having is like irritate me alot.... mayb because i'm falling sick anytime... ytd was having fever and dun feel good at all... on my way to school my tummy prangai... feel like going back home and sleep... but proceed on to school and get to know my team was like no comment... goshhh!!! hopefully nxt week will be a better day for me...

to those whu tot im nt in a good mood or what.... i'm alrite... its just that i'm irritated and dun feel well... so dont think too much la....haira i'm not mad at you at all la dear team leader..... sori if i dun seems to have the mood today alrite....

daydEe i miss you so much.... i haven complete the essay that you ask me to write down.... heheh.... but i did my journal and part of the essay liao.... hehehh... tkde ilham thus never complete it lor....

fyp is giving me a hard time now.... left with only 2 mths or so for us to complete everything...
it's like WTH.... i haven even complete the labview part for the ECG and that will take me sometime especially without any help from that scooby doo... i'm dead... but the happy part is that i manage to do the wireless transmission part... weeeeEE!!! congrats 2 faeza, haira and steven... wahahaha....

i'm soooo sianx now... my stomach is making hell out of noises but i dun feel like eating and that's worst... wat's wrong with me today??? i lost....

2008-11-13T14:14:00.002+08:00

been a while i update. kind of busy with things and no mood to upate also. so yah ended up nt updated. hahaha... there's a lot of things that i want to update on la but let me start about last friday.

when to pick my daydEe from jurong east interchange. he book out from there. like kental go discovery centre. haha.... nurul was there toooo... n was supposed to pick scooby doo... but due to miscommunication, both ended up at different places... funny. 1 already in the train while another at the platfrom waiting for the train... hahs.. but at last get to mit that scooby doo laa.... damn blur la he... dun noe how to communicate properly... hehehe... out of no where i ask that scooby doo where he wanna tag along for dinner. haha... he was like orhhh okie can lor... nurul was like huh?!! loSt... hehe... just trying my luck to let dat 2 go out 2gether evnthough with some of us too la...

when to accompany scooby doo to change up and all.. damn slow la but nt so bad compare to my dear daydEe... heeee!! but pity dEe coz he carry his BIG bag around after this camp. dah la penat and i make him more penat.... hais... i'm sorry daydEe... i LOVE u .... the dinner lasted till like 10 plus i guess.... damn late lor coz busy talking about NS life and all... fun though.. made our way back and took train. dEe took cab from UT and when back home after sending me back home... weeeee!!!!

sAturday when to lepak with my daYdee since it have been a LOng time since i spEnd my time with hIm .... after whIch mIT fIrdaUs for at BUGIS... while waiting we had lunch and in a while firdaus caMe.... had some chat with hym and he's make lame jokes and all....hehehhe.... walk into bugis village and have a look at things there... i wanna buy that t-shirt together with dEe....
following that Mus join in... proceed on to Marina Square pizza hut as they have not been there for quite a long time... thus had dinner there while waiting for that Reesha to come and join us....
damn full after dinner and off to esplanade to lepak.... wahahaa.... long time never go there sia... daydEe no time to bring me there.... saded... :(( took pictures together and telling jokes ... calling each other names.... heheh... dat's fun lor.... off to mrt ... gt smth happened that make me scared. was damn scared till dEe hug me close to him and told me not to see... just dont know why is there such person in this world.... hais.... ohhh welll... tanx dEe for sending me home.....
ILy jUmalEe....

sUndaY we had breakfast cum LunCh together before he bOOk in bacK agaIn.... after which went shoppIng to buy his camp things.... den off to take his big bag... time is up!! sobX2... :((
watever it is or how long it takes i'll always wait for you daydEe... reason beIng yOu're just my daYdEe....!! luV ya alOt....

that was all about last wks' and for this wk will be the same.... he's in camp and having field camp and all... as for me is only school and lepaking with my friends.... how i wish dEe is here now by my side.... haisSss... :((( 1 more dae to go and dEe will be back!!!! yIpEee!!!!
i reallY miss hIm aloT ..... i niD u saYang here with me..... sobx2 :(((

2008-10-14T21:32:00.002+08:00

waiting for my daydEe to msg.....
9.30pm liao still haven admin...
tick tok tick tok tick tok.....
sianxing as always....
gt nth to do....
hais....

hope dat he can book out dis sat....
if nt saddening for me coz i cnt mit hym for like 2 wks....
oh my god!!!
i'll just fill up my day with working and working and working.....
no mood also to go jln raya w/o dEe around....
y must dat people be so strict....
hate confinements 2 de core...
hais....

daydee....
i mish u alot la syg....
can i spend time with you....
i'll always pray for ur health and safety....
cpt2 la POP so not so bad i suppose ............
i wanna tell u smth dat i wan u 2 alwaes rmbr....
u're the onli one that i alwaes tink and keep in my heart...

iLy....

haira kecik....
must jia you for ur math olevels....
make sure u pass this time round....
wish u all de best....
dun b so stress up with FYP coz olevel oso IMPT....
try 2 manage ur own time orites my dear....
i'll try 2 help and do my part as ur team members...
& also as ur FWN.....
tyke care girL....

2008-10-07T09:45:00.002+08:00

i'm bored sooooo damn bored lor.....
so decided to blog....
dusty liao la.....
hahaha....

been skipping class so many time liao....
elective onli came for 2 time onli...
sum more gt UT le.....
pandai sia dis girl...
struggling....

i wan to go jlN raya....
faster le people....
i wan 2 go out...
please3....
nk duit raya frm haira....
yeah2....

love my daydee many many.....
i'm sorry if i alwaes make u angry....
hais.....

meow meow meow meow.....
meow meow meow meow meow meow.....
muackS....!!!!

i wanna hug n kiss frm u......

2008-09-17T23:42:00.002+08:00

i mIsH my deAr jUmalEe alots....
counTing dwN frM nW tiLL 28 sEpt...
10 more daes to go ....
tIme pLs flY fasTer......
i REallY Mish mY daYdEe...

PleaSe2 lEt me hAve hyM 4 mYselF....
soBx2....

2008-09-11T23:48:00.002+08:00

few days left for me....
feel so sad wen i noe he haf 2 go...
doing something that he shud be doing...
having no choice for hym to choose from...

cnt imagine hw life is after sudden change....
without any preparation done before hand....
doing things all alone without you by my side...
de feEling iS iNcoMplete....

everytime i stared straight into ur eyes....
it really hurt me alot....
as i noe dat i cant be doing it animore...
randomlY i'll just move forward to u & hug u tiedly...
as if i dun even wan 2 let u go aniwhere far away from me...
kiss u on ur liPs and whisper to ur ear,"i lOve yOu".....
dat's alwaes the things dat i do wen i feel dat i nid u 2 noe ....
i'm scared dat i cant change to de surrounding that is going 2 square 1....

daydEe...
since the first time i noe u, i can feel dat we can be more den a friend...
even before we met up i've gt dis feeling dat i somehow like ur character...
de way u msg me is different from others....
i feel comfortable being with you....
dat's y i decided to met u for de 1st time...
no regrets mitting u eventho' ......
having fun teasing u....
laughing.....
it was hell of joyful moments dat i haf with you syg....
i just hope dat dis wun stop because of anithing...
BUT it have to come to an end for the time being...
tOO fast for me to even spend de veRi last mOments wif my daydEe....
but why must it be so fast....
haisss.......

something that i wanna tell u is that.....
i wun leave u alone wen u nid me....
i'll wait for u no matter what ....
my LoVe 4 u'LL nvr Fade....
daT'S my pRomise 2 u....

haiRA must chOng for FYP,...
cYa later....

Relief....

2008-09-05T00:14:00.002+08:00

tanx god dat mamat nvr turn up....
for wat reason i dun ever care at all...
what i noe is that abviously he's MCM paHam....
belo nye budak....
suke hati kau la mamat....
as long as he've stop disturbing my life....
i'm happy coz i gt no time to entertain all dis ppl...
waste my precious time on things that is stupid 4 wat rite...

2day was de 1st lesson for 3yrs 2semester.....
left with afew mnths and i'm done wif poly life....
bt i've sooo de veri stress up with the modules and fyp...
dat's enuf to kill me over the next 16 month in this school....
class today was fun as my team members was superb de duperb...
kept laughing and giggling over things and making fun of the things...

opposite class was haira's class....
the KAMPONG MELAYU KLASS...
hahahaha.... lots n lots of melayu there...
dun noe how's de hell did haira endure in her class...
confirm frustrating coz of thier irritating attitudes and actions....
n beside my class was the WAK TANJONG KLASS....
wat i heard is that there's alot of minah tudung there....
veri funny lor.....
hahaha....

a few days left for me to be with daYdEe....
cnt imagine hw's life w/o hym out of the sudden...
everyting nid 2 depend on myself....
taking care of myself.....
i dun even noe whether i can do dat....
i'm just use 2 b taken care of...
sOb2.

ILY MANY2 JUMALEE......

2008-08-31T01:12:00.002+08:00

i luV u daYdeE....
random gIler....
hahaha....

wen 2 watch baybeats wif my dear crazy claN....
cOnsiSting of NuruL, yaNa,fEe2 and nt 2 4get mY dEar dEe....
hahaha.... oooHhh yah... pLus jUb coZ yaNa waS dere wat....
oooHHh weLL...
reaLLy enJoy mYselF eventHough tIred....
beeN staNdinG siNce 11am tIll 11pM....
12 hRs oF staNdin can diE le...
hahahaha.......
nasiB gt mY daYdEe daT cN lyN my kaRenah wEn i'M tired....
yeah2....

& yah nt 2 4get i dUn liKe 2 sHaRE my daYdEe wif otheR ppL...
sO fEe2 toOOoo bAd....
hahaha......

goNNa slP liAo....

2 all de mUsliM pEople dat's menYambut-inG buLan pUase....
sLamat berpuAse.......
jGn poNteng2 tau....
tuHAn maRAh...
nt gOOd....
hehe...
tata..

2008-08-27T00:45:00.002+08:00

sadDening.....

tanx u soo much 4 tell me dat ....
nw den i noe dat de truth is....
everything is laid out infront of me nw...
truth really hurt me alot.....
i've wasted my time being attached all dis while...
with sum1 dat DOESNT EVEN APPRECIATE ME.....
MANUSIA MCM NI PUN ADER.....
shall just put dis bullshit aside n lupekn....
treating it as if it nvr happenned......
easy 2 sae den doing rite....
but i shAll trY.....
wif dE heLp frM my loVe onEs.....
esPeCiallY dEe....
luV yA sYg....

enuf if pasRah-inG....
bacK 2 my hyPer side....
laTer goIng seNtOsa wiF my CrazY clAn & daYdEe...
yeaH2....
hOpe Dat i'LL haF fuN wiF my dEe...
nK take pIcS many2...
yeah2...
luV ya dEe...

i misH -inG u sOoo de mUch....
muAcks!!!

2008-08-22T15:02:00.002+08:00

feel like blogging....
random feeling....
so yah....
here am i typing....

hmmm.....
wat telah happen to my taggy board....
tsk2 cian my taggy.....
tk bersalah.....
i dun noe wat's de motive of dat DIN...
ape tah die dpt from doing all dis crapping thingy....
2 la org suro cari keje yg afdal tknk.... ungkal..... nk jgk buat keje yg tk berfaedah....
gasak kau la mamat....
jgn nanti things get worst den nk menyesal sudah....

to by dear daydee....

luV ya soooooo deeee muccchhh....
muackssss.....!!!!!
watever happen u'll alwaes b wif me....
dun alwaes get angry easily okie....
nanti kene jual aru tau....
hahaha....

counting down to our 2mths.....
yeah2....
cpt seh time flies....
den time for u 2 go NS is coming soon ....
cnt denied dat oso la....
bt i tink that i wanna tell u is dat i'll wait 4 u no matter wat...
i wanna u 2 go wif a clear mind ....
dun tink of unnecessary things coz i noe wat 2 do...
i wun do ani stupid things nor unnessary things.........
luv ya.....

if can for the first few wks of the fasting daes....
i wanna break fast wif you....
realli i wanna dat to happen.....
coz i wan 2 spend the time left wif u....

seriously i'm gonna mish u like hell....
iLuvyou dear daydee.....
muacks....

c ya later syg....
assalamualaikum.... =)

2008-08-21T02:15:00.002+08:00

lost....
things dun really goes smoothly nowadaes....
i'm nt sure y but mayb dere's a reason behind it....
however i just hope that things will goes back to normal soon...
.cnt really stand being in this situation for a long time like dis...
i like my bestie's new look...
she looks cute wif dat new hair style...
wait till she wear her new spectacle and she'll look totalli different....hahaha,....
i oso wanna do my hair la like dat,...mcm best plk uh perm hair rite....ohhh welll.....hahaha...

dis irritating guy really pissing me off wif his tagging...
nonsences totalli nonsences lor dis guy....
really gt nth to do....
thus decided to disturb ppl....
hais...
manusia mcm gini pun ader...
ya allah....
ape lah nk jadi dgn dunia ni...
seriousli if u really gt smth against me den sae,...
dun cari pasal wif other ppl....
just cum straight to the point n tell me whu's de hell is u....
n wat's exactli u wan....

today smth funny happened....
was going 4 tuition @ sembawang n daydee sent me dere,...
wen up to 10 story and daydee passby de house....
my student was shocked for no reason when she saw me...
den de mum ask me whether i scared of lizard or nt...
i was like stund...
i'm scared too...
geli 2 de max....
eeeeeeeeeeeeee...
so decided to called daydee up 2 kill de lizard...
wat's funny is dat de lizard was damn small..
wahahahahahaha......
daydee spray de baygon maham byk giler seh...
.de mum was like standing damn far frm de kitchen window....
hahaha...
i onli step nt scared nt actualli penakot oso...
after a lot of spraying, de lizard commit sucide....tsk2....
da mati liao
yeah2.... irsyaad2 bdae cuming soon...chey2 nk msk 18yrs old nmpk....watever it is we'll celebrate same2 wif adek ok...
doned.... lastly, i wanna sae dis:
daydee, i luv u loads n i hope dat we'll last long till biler2...regardless whether we gado or nt...i'll still luv u ....tyke care daydee...muacks....

daydee ku' syg

2008-08-17T02:20:00.002+08:00

sejak pertame kali ku lihat kamu....
my heart beat fast....
wat i can sae is i like u frm de start....
but i just dun trust on love @ 1st sight...
thus i decided to b a fwn of urs....
frm a stranger2 to a friend....
it doesnt stop there for some reasons...
daes after daes....
wks after wks...
the feeling develop bit by bits till i noe that u're de 1 i wanna be wif....

the strange things is that i didnt even think abt my x wen i'm wif u...
sumthing that is rare bt true...
life nid 2 move on...
yeah2...
so yah...
here am i ....
being wif my dear mr JUMALEE....
spending every single time wif hym...
just so happening and nvr fail to make me smile...
de moments was wonderful...
nvr xpect dat 2 turn out like dat...

10 july 2008....
a dae that witness us....
de joy, happiness cnt really b describe in words....
reason being it's something special taking place in our life...
both were no longer single bt instead being part of each other...

1o aug 2008...
1 dae after national dae...
1 mth for us being together as 1...
lots of TESTs we're gone thru'...
together as 1 we solve it...
in a good waes for sure...
cuz no matter hw we argueed...
we'll cum back 2 each other..
cuz i cnt bear to seperate frm u...
i luv u syg.....

nw that we've gone thru' almost 2 mths....
i hope that we've learnt how 2 change...
for the better...
n i noe u did dee....
i appreciate it....

bet lots of things gonna happen....
be it a test or wat...
i'm nt sure...
wat i noe i nid u 2 b by my side alwaes...
no matter wat...
my love wont change for no reason...
baybee will alwaes love u daydee...
muacks....

2008-08-15T12:32:00.002+08:00

bOOoo.... updating bout the trip dat i wen on weds....
wen to TEKONG... nice place i can sae... but the ferri was sucks..
make me feel like vomitting.... hais...

upon reaching dere, wat i can see was alot2 of abg2 KATAK.... WAHAHAHA...
but super de duper de hot la dere... cnt tahan bt still have 2 endure...
wen to de auditorium to have a talk by the people dere...
gd thing we sat at the top part.... cuz yana slp thru out the speech... wahahaha....
funny sia... suddenli shut down system...

after speech ended...gt dis one cute guy came and was holding dis yellow flag.....
yana & nurul was like ," eh2.. yellow2.... gi kt yg yellow nye... melayu2...." haha...
bt actualli we are supposed 2 go 2 de yellow flag guy... wahahaha... belo....
one thing i dun like dat guy was he's unfriendly type of person la....
ppl talk 2 hym buat bolyn... kn da kene lable pekak... 2 bad...

nxt was de part that they intro us the NS things... like bags & etc.....
dat guy was cute too though but daydee cuter la... hahaha...
crap... haha... but he talk super de funny.... tk tipu lor.... wahahaha....
i guess he short tongue uh... but cute enuf liao lor... so i gif hym dis nick name....
MR SHORT TONGUE... or in short... MR S ..... haha... cute rite...
haira... since u wanna dat guy rite... suitable 4 u oso... short but cute... hehee...
mcm paham jer.... peaceee....

de tawafing ard tekong was damn tired... mcm nk pitam... coz weather hot den kept going in & out of air-con rooms... cn die liao.... hahaha... but the veri2 best & fun part that i like was the shotting .... i mish shooting sia... dpt lepas kn rindu dat dae.... holding riffle....
de feel was fun .... been 3 yrs i guess.... rindu beb.... hahaha...
nurul cn sae pro jgk eh shooting... hahaha... hidden talent btl la bdk ni... hahaha.....
but de cutest one was yana.... she shoot veri cute... den complain hand pain la dis la dat la....
hahaha... funny lor she... hahaha.. dat's my adik hahah...

last was de home sweet home part.... yeah2.... dat was de best coz all da tired... hahaha...
plus hungry.... headed to changi airport... popeye.... hahaha... had dinner den wen for tuition...
so de duper de tired lor... dat's de end of the whole dae journey... yay!!!

cum to tink abt tekong... just feel down abit la... de time for hym to go is approching nearer and nearer... i'm nt totalli prepared 4 dat... going tuition alone... going back frm skul alone...
no nite chatting.... no hugesss and gud nite kisses... ish222.... cane eh... hais....

daydeee.... i just love u and only u......

2008-08-07T11:32:00.002+08:00

FYP presentation is doNed for dis semester....
weeeEEE.... coNgRates 2 eveRyone.....
especially mY team memBers,...

just dun understand y all this happen....
it's like sumtime i tink that it's difficult to trust sum1....
especially when they haf alot of history dat still exists....
it's not a BIG deal though....
watever it is lets fate decide la hor.....

hopefully bestie is alright now....
i'm sorry i cant help u much....

2008-07-28T02:13:00.002+08:00

confusion taking over now.....

i dun know what I'm doing is right or not.....

please faeza don't hurt people that is innocent....

think and ask yourself what you want in life now....

ask yourself that and you'll know what you want in life...

don't throw tantrum at someone that doesn't deserve it....

because it's very wrong.....

goshhhh!!!....

what's happening to me???

not being myself now....

will be back soon enough when things get back to normal....

take care people....

Ily dee.....

2008-07-22T00:30:00.002+08:00

yay!!! at last i cn log into my bloggy....
i wan 2 update alot alot alot of things le....
but let me start by stating that i'm attached....
yes!! i'm attach 2 a guy by de name of JUMALEE.....
i just wish dat it will last long....
i cnt bear 2 be hurt 4 the third time....

life is simple nwadaes bt happening....
wif my clans ard and my dear....
dey really make my dae....
i'm back 2 my own self....
yes2 i am.....
weeeee....

nw a get to noe the truth....
but wat different does it make???
been waited for like mths.....
but i'm jst left wif nth but 2 guess it myself....
trying my best 2 make u smile...
coz i love it when i c dat smile on ur face....
i was damn dwn wen you start emoing...
jst wish dat i can take away all ur probs...
but it's beyond my limit....
i tried to help but u reject it....
wat's more i can do other den trying to talk 2 u.....
time passes by and things getting nmrl...
bit by bit i cn feel dat de emo side of u is gone....
de smile dat i've been waiting have finally came...
super happy .....
but smth bothering me....
wat will happen if u noe de truth....???
i dun wanna be a steal,....
dat steal de smile and joy frm u....
i felt bad abt myself...
hurting people....
gosh....

things happen eventually.....
but dat was 2 soon....
u admitted de truth....
but it wont make a different...
instaed i feel akward....
i'll miss all de things....
hw am i supposed 2 face de future ???

didnt wen 4 skul...
was quite wierd as i didnt alight @ wdlds....
wen sumwhere 2 clear my mind...
wasnt in de rite mind.....
tinking wat will happen nxt....
i break dwn...
for no reason....
i'm nt ignoring u or avoiding....
i just feel different,....
jst dun understand y...
cnt u jst convince me.....
i loose hope.....

dis is wen story started.....

2008-07-10T13:37:00.000+08:00

morning people.....

thinking what have been happening to my life....
people around emo-ing....
keeping quite.....
but why??
what happen to my clan people...??
where's my abg & adik???
where's syafiq??
where's khaty???
where's boboy??
where???
drifting bit by bit....
4 what reason??
i'm not sure...
i miss all de moments....

deep inside me....
de feeling of guiltiness is growing...
every time..... every moments......
hais.....

wanna say thank you...
for loving me for who i am....
entertaining my crazyness & attitude....
you mean so much to me.....
but I'm sorry because problems kept poping....
insyallah it'll end sooonnnn.....

2008-07-01T20:21:00.002+08:00

choices nid to be made....
be it good or bad...
take a risk....

2 choices in my mind....
- moVe on & be happy
- sTay sadedning....

hais...
no one choose 2 b sad alwaes....
it's all de matter of u wan or nt....

coNfusion.....

2008-06-24T22:42:00.002+08:00

60% of kesabaran left.....
decreasing bit by bit...
day by day...
goSh....

nt being myself nowadaes....
kiping quite.....
stone-ing....
being too crazy & irritating....
dat realli nt me....
hais....

cnt concentrate doing things....
my mind jst dun function as normal....
like jst nw...
chat wif my dear yana bt i type things dat's in my mind...
random....

2 my brother zaki.....
tanx for being so concern abt me...
appreciate it very the much...
& making me laugh all de wae during the breakouts....

nw i feel like smoking....

2008-06-22T23:31:00.002+08:00

tiredness...
just got back home.....
wkends was fun 4 me.....
mit fah for the 1st time...
nice guy .... funny.... cute....
dat's my 1st impression for hym la...
hmmm....

been tinking abt wat mus said ytd....
mayb dis shud end sooner or later....
he feels bad n so do i....
but i just dun wan 2 hurt ppl's feelings....
i noe hw it feels wen dat happens....
gosh.... dilemma seh....
watever it is...
i respect ur decision la daddy....
as long as ure happy....
i'll try 2 b hapi 2...
insyallah.....

dis question suddenli pop-up in my mind....
haf i really move on frm hym ???
y cnt i just sae a 'YES' wen ppl ask???
wat's wrong wif me???

2008-06-20T23:49:00.002+08:00

a few more minutes syafiq turning 19 liao....
hopefully he like the present and the small celebration ...
was quite rushing la....
poor planning but end up to be a nice one....
will update some of the pictures later....
hehehe.....

lab was fun.... hahaha...
did experiments that i myself dun understand...
hahaha... funny rite,....
but i can help max write the report... LOL...
took pic wif adelyn n my haira....
funnnnn!!!

y must he show temper to ppL whu's nt at fault??
hais.... nearly broke down just bcoz of hym...
he just me feel as if i make a mistake....
tried 2 comfort hym but failed....
i just let hym be like that....
effort nt appreciated....
sadedning.....

breaking down since he msg me ytd....
once a while i just feel like crying....
he alwaes sae,"pegi la cari pengganti...."
does he have feeling??? or is he so damn heartless??

2008-06-18T23:14:00.002+08:00

asalamualaikum.....

here i wanna sae dat....
i'm sori for avoiding ppl ....
but it's just so complicated....
i'm still a fwn of ur for sure......
dat's wat i can ensure you alwaes....

feel so bad for make ppl feel so small....
dat's y i hate 2 hurt pple's feeling....
feels so bad doing dat...
but wat i can do??
dat's life & i nid 2 adapt 2 it...

'berhenti mengharap'.....
dis phrase realli remains me of the past....
yah... realli i does....
i still do miss hym sometime....
hais...

will time heel de wounds???
it's true???

2008-06-15T00:35:00.002+08:00

deadlY tirEd . . . . . . .

coNfusioN . . . . .

dEad . . . .

lOst . . . . . .

2008-06-14T01:42:00.003+08:00

bOOOoooOO!!!!

1stli i'm soooo de soRi dat thIngs gOes wrOng jst nw....

i'll maKe it uP oTey oNe dae....

2ndlI i had a GreAt time 2Dae gOin oUt wiF mY HI-6 cLan...

hehe.. nIce naMe hUh... uNiqUe....

aniWae... wen fUnAn 2 haF diNNer....

den weN 2 HaF beN & jeRRy afTer daT....

heaVen!!!!

afTer whIch weNt esPlanaDe 2 LEPak....

ramai sIak mat REp... reMas dOk...

hahaha....

kepT takiNg piCs here n DerE,...

fuNN !!!

bUt thOse piCs mUsrt waIt 4 nUruL 2 uPloAd....

" NURUL CPT LA UPLOAD!!!"

oVeralL... i juSt love dIs pIc... nIce!!!!

DAT'S YANA & FAEZA.....

camat pagy peoPle!!!!

tyke care......

bYe.....!!

2008-06-11T00:04:00.002+08:00

areNt being myself nwadeas....

halF oF me is nT here....

missIng somethin bit by bit....

but i'm not sure wat it is....

hais....

2008-06-09T23:15:00.002+08:00

assalamualaikum to all....
hahaha....
was slacking @ home all de wae.....
sian la sial!!!
i wanna go out wif haira....
girl....!!! dun 4get our date dis fri....
hahaha....

wen out 2 mit bestie....
miss her lots....
talk abt peribahase dat she herself gt it wronng...
so funny la her.....
eventhough it was jst a while i do treasure it.... =)

at last i noe wat's happening....
good thing it was settle....
1 less thing to tink abt nw....

random thoughs...
i miss going 2 skul nw....
miting my fwns & faciS....
crazy-ing wif my cLans...
lepak-ing wif them...
talking craps....
disturbing ppl.....
gosh....
=(

pelik la FAEZA!!!!
ape kene tah ni bdk....
tsk2....
mayb bcoz of de fever dat i had dis morning....
i dun wanna fall sick pleaseeee!!!

kept missing hym dis few daes....
random siak FAEZA!!!!!!!!
wat does dat mean den???
wat haira sae might be true but....
nta la... tk perlu seh ni smue....
dun wan to spoilt wat i haf nw by all dis stupid things....
nt worth after all...
hais....
dis is sux... bodoh la...!!!!
can i just act as if nth happen??
till wen can i endure all dis & lying 2 myself ni FAEZA???
haiyooo!!!!
or shud i just dump dat feeling into de laut dlm2...??
hmmmm....
tink faeza tink tink!!!!
sob2....

saded!!! i mish eating my ben n jerry ice cream..... =(
can i have dat on fri PWISH HAIRA!!!
hahahaha....

ohhhh yah.....
y mst i gado wif hym??
wat a question he posted 2 me seh....
i'm so de innocent le...
god pleasee!!!
i dun wan dat 2 happen....
small kid scared....

nid 2 slp earli le...
if nt he'll nag n nag @ me...
hehehe....
camat mlm....!!!

2008-06-09T00:40:00.005+08:00

decided to blog at this time....
I LUV DIS PICX & I LUV MY ADEQ HAIRA 2!!!!
hahaha... took dis @ ben n jerry nye kedai...
had my fav ice cream.... YUMMY2!!!!
den as per nrml lepak wif my dis giler fwn of mine...
crappin & laughing....
onli us making hell out of noise dere...
take picx was de best part lor....
den back 2 wdlds 4 tuition....

lol.... goshh... i'm werking later yet haven slp...
FAEZA!!! wat's de hell happening to u????
dun emo2 la faeza.... tsk2....
smth just doesnt goes rite for me.....
de feeling is so de nt good....
ani1 cn jst tell me y???
sobx2.....

been working all dis while.... keje2 till naik mendak seh.... bt wat to do.... rather den rotting...
so yah.... here am i werking non stop.... bt gt money later 2 shop2.... wEE!!!!
2dae was a shockin dae 4 me coz my DADDY came 2 mit me @ workplace....
been awhile dat i met hym n jst nw i really was happy 2 mit hym lor....
bt rite it's just so complicated la..... damn confusing.....
dat's wen confusion occurs.....
hahah...
MEREPEK LA FAEZA....!!!!

life startin 2 get more painful n irritating at times....
like wat my DADDY sae i'm just nt readi 2 accpt ppl....
bt in my heart i tink i've found some1 dat fit it my heart....
BUT.....
mayb it might not be de right person....
i just scared to be hurt again ....
trust me... i'm TIRED!!!

dae after dae i'm missing something in my life....
de feeling of incompletance is alwaes dere....
n it's sux 2 de max,....

sometime i just sit n thought for a moment...
wat i wan i life.....???
since wen is faeza an emo kid...???
adakah silapku untuk menyintai dirimu??
will dere be hope or shud i just dun bother abt it???

i wonder.....
all left unwritten....
damn it!!!

will i be able to leave evey single past of mine behind and look at de bright side nw???
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
onli god noes it.....

happy reading okie adeq.... n camat pagi 2 u...!!! =)

2008-05-27T22:13:00.007+08:00

uPdatIngggGGG.....

hahaha... gonNa sHare thIngs that happen LaSt week.....

let me start bY sayIng "THANK YOU ABG ZAKI 4 DE LOLIPOPS....!!!"

after uT wen 4 a 'SIBLING DATE' @ airport....

hahaha.... wen for dinner 1st coz i veri hungry.....

den wen tour ard airport....

from T3 to T1 @ last ....

was daMn tired la....

walk2 till lOSt coz dun nOe where de viewiNg mall daT i alWaEs gO.....

hahaha... tanx eh aBg for mAking me seSat aRd airpOrt...

liKe tOurisT sIA.... hahaha

tOOk sO maNy maNy manY piCs @ de sKy tRain & alsO tRainss.....

sOOOoooo daMn fuN la TiLL tK iGt nK baLIk... hahaha...

verY verY selDom 2 get 2 sPend tIme wiF my dIs bRothEr la....

bz all De waY... hahahaha....

aFter a vEry lOng2 daE..... we decIded 2 gO hOme.... wEEeee!!!..

HAPPY DAE FOR ME.!!!!!

diS piCs i EdiTed fOr mY bRo.... mUst cOmMeNt wHich 1 nIce oK abg....

hahahaha.... best 4 fotoS dat i Like....

mon 26/5 was abg zaki's burfdae offically......

was so damn happi coz he's turning 20 yrs old n i'm onli 2 yrs old....

wahahahaha!!!!!

bought for hym slice of ice-cream cake & also a shirt....

hope u reallY like it....

sooooo de sorry i didnt wrap the pResent up for you abg.....

& also it does not turn 2 be dat fun la....

hais....

but i really hope u enjoy ur dae & de time we went ouT la.....

ABG!!!! 'GILER!!!' HAHAHAHAH......

dat's all i guess for nw....

will update soon abt Other things...

nw like no tiMe hahaha...

1 mOre thing....

FAEZA DUN SLACK ANIMORE....!!!

i'm scared of my fyp cnt dooooo!!!.....

haiRa tanx you for being dere weN i in nEEd of sum1.....

lUv you....

tata....

2008-05-22T14:38:00.005+08:00

HAPPY 20TH BURFDAE LOST KID.....

hahaha.... @ last i'm like 2YRS OLD.... tsk2....

wanna blog alot2 of things....

dis yr's burfdae is de special yet saddening one....

have been blowing candles for like 3 time....

WEEEEEEeee!!! really had so much fun dis few daes....

had celebration @ workplace wif my dear viVian on de 19th may....

hahaha... she bought alot2 of food.... cakes..... donuts..... hahaha....

all my fav bt i cnt eat everything!!! hahaha...

dis is de cake dat she bought 4 me.....

hahaha... nxt was on tues.... i was surprised dat my E44a classmates

made dis celebration for me....

awwwww!!! i'm so touched by their actions....

thank you IRSYAD for planning dis.....!!!

dis's my 2nd cake frm my e44A pEEps.....

back to my E25H class..... dey wishes me.....

isHak sanG dis burfdae song 2 me.... tanx you....

weds was my big dae.... hahahaha.... so damn happi...

but i noe dat i wun be dat happy coz something wont be going as planned.....

hais.... i just dun wan dat 2 happen.... but i cnt do anithing....

goSh... oh well.....

had lunch wif anwar, sean, gf & syahril....

was really fun spending time wif them.....

laugh and laugh and laugh till stomach painnn......

den wen back 2 sch coz my abg call me back....

spend time wif them and suddenli cake pop up.....

and guess wat... my fav oreo ice-cream cake...... waahhhH!!

took alot2 of pIc derE wiF mY dear pEEpS....

i'LL uPdate it wen mY dear nUrul pass it 2 Me.....

was beIng sabO by aLL..... loLs.....

fUn.... bUT my face all kena cake and i smell like OreO icecream cake....

hahahahah.....

after all de saboing n pLayin..... we jst lepak dere....

den disturb ppL till i nVr go 4 de fOto taking n BaCk 2 lab....

hahaha.....

after skul wen 2 VIVO CITY...... weeeEEE!!!

play water dere.... n get wet frm head 2 toe...... saded....

tanx 2 anwar n sean lor.....

de saddening part happen @ roof top bt i shall nt sae it....]

so sad n still feeling so dwn bcoz of dat.....

y is FAEZA so bad n do all dis 2 him....???

tsk2....

ard 10pm we went off frm vivo....

tanx anwar 4 sending me home..... hahahaha....

really had fun on dat dae.....

wen my 2nd sis reach home.... she brought cake home...

wOw!!! another cake 2 go.... hahhaa

we cut de cake n had a piece each coz nite areadi.....

canot eat 2 much @ nite.... hahahaha....

so damn touched wen dey sang burfdae song 2 me.....

love u so much la sistaZ.....

dis wAs my anoTher cake......

hahaha....

2 all dat make my BIG dae a special one......

i would like 2 sae...

"thank you"......

love u guys alot2.....

n haira..... thank 4 de DALE.....

abg zaki.... tmr we'll go out orites.....

will update soon.... tc.....

2008-05-12T23:53:00.005+08:00

back to update about things

dat have been taken place...
been doing alot of thinking....
FYP.... SINGLE LIFE.... FWNS....

UTS.... DAILY GRADES..... FAMILY....
gosh..!! cn go crazy sia....
cn i haf a break frm PROBS please.....
cn i haf some1 2 tok 2 about all dis things??
where's my CHIP & DALE goooo???
i mish u guys by my sides....
i cnt take care of myself....
PLEASE CUM BACK...
*crying*...

been a good time wen i'm wif the 'GILER' gRp...
dey really try 2 make me happi especially dat

care bear n also my dearest abg & gile khaty....
life isnt boring wif them ard....
giler -ing.... belo-ing.... disturbing..... fun though ....
still sometime i tend 2 breakdwn....
dere's still emptyness in me....
tried very2 hard 2 replace it bt i jst cnt....
IMPOSSIBLE.....

turning 20 in 8 more daes i guess....
cnt believe it i'm alreadi 20.....
OHHH NOOOO!!!!.....
hahahha.....
i got 1 wish dat i wanna wish for my burfdae....
[[[ PLEASE2 LET ME HAF C&D BY MYSIDE...]]]
dat's de onli thing dat'll make me happi.....

going for a date wif my 'abg' on de 23 may.... weeeee!!!!
hope dat it'll be funnnn......
yeahhhhh!!!..
abg!!!! i wan 20 presents!!!!!
lol.....

gD morning every1.....!!!!

i'm sooo tired of crying nW.....
will you even rmbr abt me animore??
will you ??
will you???????

HIDUPPENUHDGNTANDATANYA.................

.........................................................

2008-05-03T00:04:00.002+08:00

a WanNa RuN aWay fRm aLL dIs....

aWay fRm everYtHin....

2008-04-23T15:30:00.002+08:00

loTs and loTs of things taking Place dIs daes.....
be it good or bad....
been a long time since i'm updating dis blog....
hahaha....
been bz wif tuition and working...
damn fun la making myself bz with things......

fyp is so damn stressing for me...
one thing oso i haven do....
die la...
5th week must do report...
i'm totalli dead coz i'm totalli lost...
gosh....

turning 20 soon..
haha....
i wish i cn spend time wif my bestie la.
simply mish her alot2...
been wondering whether she's doing fine or nt....
hopefulli she's happy wif her fwns and all....

sometime life dun alwaes go as what we alwaes planned....
mayb dat's reason for that la...
but most of the time it's just as complicated as possible....
learn alot of things for life.....
just that sometime i just dun understand something...
why must things just goes that way bt not this way....

orites.... i'm done here....
update soon when i feel like updating....
to bestie if u nid sum1 just cum to me orites...

assalamualaikum.... =)

2008-03-13T23:11:00.002+08:00

just dun noe y ppl nwadaes very de bz body...
kalah kn pompuan....
hais...
watever it is....
i wun bother 2 entertain all dis nonsence ppl...
dah tkde keje lain agak nye....

oh welll....
dry run was preety fun ytd....
yet damn tired..
i injurd my hand... gosh...
very pain lor....
cnt even carry box during working time...
still gt 1 more dry run 2 goo....
die la...

was fun coz i gt 2 mit more ppl...
like de yr 2s...
crazy yet fun bunch of freaks...
had dinner wif dem...
den was late 4 tuition....
hahaha... as usual la...
puntualiti prob...
hahaha..

lappy giving me a very hard time now...
kept hanging here n dere...
fucking irritating....
aiyo....
mintak kene campak jer tau lappy ni...
hais...

da la....
stop here...
tyke care peeps...

2008-03-01T00:35:00.002+08:00

wadsup dere....
been so bz till no time to update...
so nw taking a bit of my time updating....

been tired dis few dates eversince having tuition....
werkin in de morning till ard 6pm den off for tuition....
damn tiring but i'm just use to it lor...
furthermore gt nth 2 do oso...

sch is reopening soon...
i realli tot it was 14 april but nah...
it's 7 april...
gosh...
so fast...
haha...

mish my fwns alot2....
my dear abg... nurul.... akbar... my classmates...
i jst wanna spent time wif dem while i'm nt werkin...
bt i dun noe whether dey're free or nt...
oh well...
just hope 2 c dem wen sch reopen den....

noe wat...
sumtime i've been tinking...
y ppl frm de past cuming back in my life...
for me i felt hapi coz dey're here again 2 complete my life...
but in other hand... i jst feel scared...
dat i'll loose dem again...
it's nt easy 2 4get sum1 though..
hais...

watever it is....
i'll not repeat de mistake again...
for de 3rd time...

ohhh well...
i mish my bestie...

gtg... kena ask 2 go bed nw...
gd nite...
=)

2008-02-19T23:46:00.002+08:00

dun understand y all dis is happening....
been wondering....
wat am i doin rite nw is wat i realli wan ....
or just sumthin 2 lie 2 myself...
hais....

starting 2 tink abt life nwadaes....
nt's nt easy....
in fact it cn cause us regrets if we do a TINY mistake....
coz time wont come back....

been bz-ing wif work all dis daes....
plus having tuitions on mon n thurs...
haha... pretty fun though despite de tiredness...
i jst cnt imagine myself rotting w/o doin anithin...

wen for movie wif my dear vivian, welson and also syikin...
hahaha,... watch jumper.... kind of nice n funny show...
no regrets watching it... infact we realli enjoy it...
was realli glad coz i'm de one whu choose 2 watch dat... hahaha
wen ard shopping.... in n out of shops..... here n dere....
hahaha... bought sumthin 4 my sis... hope she realli like it though it's nt dat xpensive 2 her...

just hope dat everything goes fine for de ppl in my past...
kind of missing them...
bt i mst accpt it dat once dey are gone, dey wont cum back...
ohhhh wellll.... im saded....

cnt wait for the SEG camp... weeeee!!! hopefulli i gt a good n sporty team....
most of all i wanna enjoy myself....
b4 starting my FYP... hahahah....
result is out on 20 feb..
gosh...
i'm scaredddd.....

i'm stopping here....
tyke care ....
tata....

2008-01-30T22:54:00.000+08:00

booo!!
hahaha... back 2 update dis bLog....
just change de skin after a long long long time....
i'm just bored la...
so yah...
n i've new tagbox...
coz i 4got my userID n password 4 de cbox....
stm rite me...
oh well...

skul haf cum 2 an end... as in 2nd year... hahaha...
hols is takin place....
meaning i nid 2 werk 4 de whole dae...
if nt i'll b deadli bored doin nth @ home...
hahaha... gonna mish my classmates...
bt cn alwaes mit dem when gt time ...
like wat my abg wan sae... hahaha....

wen 2 bestie's sch just nw.....
had dinner wif her....
pass her some things....
hope dat she's happy n doing fine....
after which mit sis n accompany her 4 dinner...
btw towie 4 being late.... hahaha....

i just wonderin wen will things going 2 b normal...
as if me able 2 be happy & nt lost animore....
biler la mase2 2 akan dtg....
hais...
sometime i'm just tired... sick n tired of all dis...
being hurt alwaes.....
bosan 2 de max...
just hate life being like dis....
how i wish de stars can show me de wae out frm all dis mess....
haiz....

2008-01-20T22:41:00.000+08:00

people cum n go every single time....
be it for good or bad..
but sumtime i wonder...
ani reason 4 dat....
yes?! .... no?!....
just left unwritten...
in my heart...

life isn't same as wat i use to have....
things change.....
be it the people... surrounding....
been tinkin all dis while...
asl eh org slalu menyakitkn hati ssorg tanpa sebab yg btl..
just dun get it.....
daes after daes..
i just find dat smue laki same jer prangai...
mayb i'm streotyping la...
but must of the guys do haf the same attitude dat i hate alot2...
hais...

this happen w/0 us knowin....
i wanna sae sorry 2 hym for the attitude dat i gif to hym...
i'm just emotionally unstable dis few daes...
dere's smth dat bothering me bt i'm nt sure wat....
i noe i gt irritatted so easily for the past few daes...
mayb wat u sae is rite la...
bt trust me i understand ur situation...
jst dat i hate to be bubbled....
u shud no me well...
nt even u but zalikha oso...
i noe u guys haf ur reasoning...
bt y mst it be alwaes me dat bcum de victim??
asl ehh???!!!
one ofter another bubblinng me...
nw i've learn my lesson...
nvr believe watever ppl sae be it some1 dat i'm close wif or wat...
i'm just scared to trust ppl nw...
sobx2....

2 more wks to sch hols....
planning 2 werk all de wae...
keeping myself bz as alwaes....
bt i'll make time 2 mit my dear syikin...
nw i just start 2 mish her... hahaha...
i just wish dat everytin cn go back to normal...
i just wish my bestie is here by my side....
i just wish life could be much easier for me...
i just wish i could spend time to the fullest...
enjoying.... laughing non-stop....
BT....
i dun tink it might happen...
de chances is so slim...
i just scared ...
scared dat i might breakdown anitime..
scared dat i cnt face future challenges...
dat's alot of things can happen dat i'm scared of...
ohh god...
please gif some strength...
sob2...

2008-01-14T23:00:00.000+08:00

feeling down at dis moment of time....
the feeling like giving up everything dat i'm doing....
haix.... very saded...
lesson was so sux 2 de max....
dun even understand wat i'm doing in class....
dis is all bcoz of me skip last wk's lesson... stupid of me...
hais... faci was kinda irritating... dun like her @ all..... guess i'll get a C dis time..
cn't even ans her stupid question... hw stupid cn i b rite... haissss....
had cookies frm my AUNTY.... nice ... tanx euu... luv u so much... hahaha...
pity my abg going thru wat i've been going thru in de past....
ABG!!! NO MATTER WAT I'LL ALWAES B BY UR SIDE... NO MATTER WAT HAPPEN....
DUN HESITATE TO FIND ME WEN U'RE DWN OR WEN U NID SUM1 TOK 2 ....
I'LL B DERE AS AN WEN U NID ME... I'LL TRY .... JST WAN U 2 SMILE ALWAES OTEY ABG... COZ U LOOK CUTE WEN DAT SMILE OF URS IS DERE.... =p
i just dun understand sum ppl...
ppl jst simple care abt dem bt dey jst dun noe hw 2 appreciate it....
hw dumb cn dey b rite.... or are dey blind... i doubt so.... hais...
i feel like life nw is kind of wierd 4 me...
it's starting to change...
i loose everything that i used to have and nw... nth is left for me...
y uh... yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.....
wat wu gui sae is rite... nw dere's alot of y's in my life....
hais....
watever la.....
hols soonnn woohooo!!!
finding job soon... yeah....
hopefully i cn enjoy my hols dis time....
ending here....
i'll update soon...
tyke care peeps...
camat malam.... =)

2008-01-09T22:15:00.000+08:00

9 daes haf pass since 2008 cum.....
startin of a new year for me....
alot of things happen to me in 2007....
be it swit or sour.... good or bad...
it cnt be resist wat... hais....

wat i wan 4 dis year is simple....
to enjoy my dae each n every single min & sec....
i dun wan past 2 just repeat itself....
i've suffer alot during 2007...
been thru alot of shit...
learn alot frm it too....
nvr b too nice 2 guys....
hais...
asl eh all dis must happen...
y cnt things just be de same as wat we plan....
y cnt ppl learn hw to appreciate each other....
yyyyyyyyyy???
so many y cum thru my mind nw....
bdh kn.....

life 4 me as like usual....
boring... hahhaa... bt cn la...
i love being wif my mum n sistas....
dey realli make my dae....
sch is fun 4 me...
being ard my fwns....
wif hairah, ida, nurul, ishak, fir, my dear darren, n alot2 more...
it's fun.....
love dem.... alot2...
nt 4getin my DEAR ABG ZAKI...
noe wat.....
he kept his promise....
he's goin 2 stop smokin....
yaY!!!!
alhamdulillah....
jia you abg.... must cont 2 stop totalli orite....

trying to 4get abt my past wif hym....
like he alwaes sae..." YG SUDA 2 SUDA"....
he gt de point....
mayb it's jst difficult 4 me....
hais... bt i'll do it.... yeah....

AS 4 MY X.....
EH... TANX EH 4 DE PAST 4 MTH WIF U....
I JUST DUN UNDERSTAND U LA....
Y MST U DO ALL DIS EH....
ASL EH ? N BTW SAE TANX 2 UR BRO...
HE REALLI FUCK ME UP SIDE DWN....
N U DID NTH... WTF.... APE JENIS BF EH U....
NVR TOT U'RE DAT TYPE OF PERSON...
IT'S DE WORSE MISTAKE TO HAF U AS MY BF...
HAIS....

y must dere b ppl like dat....
hais... hurtin ppl's feeling... so heartless....
watever la...
guys will alwaes b guys...
prangai same jer....
hais...
bdh kn....

i wish i cn turn back to WAN...
hais...

*lost*

2007-12-12T13:37:00.000+08:00

haf been a while since i updated tis poor blog....
my dear abg kept asking me 2 update...
hahha.... so towie abg zaki coz i gt no time....
nw i'll update watever dat took place 4 de past wks....

wen to IT fare dat last3 sat i guess....
wif my dear abg zaki n nurUl....
b4 dat wen 2 revise for UT @ j.e lib....
it was so jam pack la....
wat i nOe i nearly fainted la...
cnt stand the ppl that kept push me here n dere...
bought lappy a cover....
tanx abg 4 carrying my HEAVY bag 4 me....
after dat wen 2 mit my WUI GUI....
mish hym since a long time nvr mit him...
wat i cn sae he's getting thinner and DARKER...
wakkakaakaka..... eat more otey wui gui....

sch was fun as usual...
only de boring thing is tat it haf been raining for the past few wks....
damn.... so de nt fun lor....
dun like 2 wear raincoat..... look so funni la.....
nt cute.... veri big lor....
my pp finish liao...
weeeEEE!!!
i soooo de haPPy ....
hopefully i'll pass my pp....
amin....

imishmybestie....
wen will u be free to spend time wif me.?
sobx2...

i'll stop here... i'll update soon wen i feel like updating it....
i wish i could do something that can make people happy.....
i hate that i love you so....
peaceee!!
taatata.....

2007-11-12T22:00:00.000+08:00

hey ya peepsss....

was the starting of the school today.....
1st lesson was micro c....
damn irritating yet fun.... hehehe...
gt scolding frm my DEAR faci for nt cumin 4 lesson last week....
wahahahah.... kene shot sia... saded.... hais....
lesson was preety short la....
no ppt... onli each person do 1/4 of the codes and done....
but ..... hais...
i made my team lost 4 energy... sob2...
i go click anihw lor.... wahahaha....
funni.... den everi1 disturb me.... =(
hw blur cn i be... hais....

all my 1st UTs flungs.... hais... y uh...??
study oso flung.... bodoh sia me...
i realli nid books 2 study.... realli.....
i wan 2 faster grad frm poly....
stress 2 de max.....
hais...

report is done and nw 1 more burden.... POSTER!!!
hw 2 doooo...? haiyo.... cn i just dun do all dis.... i wan exams.... sob2....
must jia you do poster & present it onces and for all.... hais...
feel so scare le 2 present... skali kena shot frm de advisor den i'm dead....
ohhh GOD help me.....!!!

life seems to very complicated.....
too much obstacles dat came @ 1 shot....
1st wen i got 2 knw dat he's gettin engaged....
2nd wen i noe i dat i must move on frm him....
3rd wen i nid 2 put all de memories dat i had wif both of dem in a box & left it bhind....
4th. . . . . . . . . . .
5th. . . . . . . .
i may nt noe wat's coming nxt 4 me....
will i ever had de strength to go thru' all dis obstacles.....
will i ever have sum1 whu realli care 4 me for whu i'm realli are....
will i ever love sumone like hw i use to love him.....
will i ever find wat's missing in my life.....
de feelin dat i have is sooo strong.....
i'm scared.... realli scared......
i'm scared 2 make de mistake again 4 de 2nd time in my life.....
i'm scared 2 hurt more ppl's feeling .......
so confused.... i realli do..... hais.....

i just wish.......
i can turn back time and make things right.....
hais..... but it's too late..... realli late to turn back.....
onli left is memories.... be it swit or sour..... i treasure it....
'good things only cum once and it'll end dere'........
dat's wat yogibear told me.... & it's true..... veri2 true....
but y must i loose sum1 dat i love soooo much.... i dun understand.....

i'm off now...... nid 2 design my logo 4 class t-shirt.....
tyke care peeps...
muacksss!!

2007-11-08T00:28:00.000+08:00

littLe kid is back 2 updaTe a bIt onli....
heheheh.....

juZ gt baCk frM bbQ-inG wiF mY E44F peepS....
iT was fUn eVenthOugh iT's raInin...
loLs...

jUst cHange mY bLogsKin....
nTh 2 do la...
cIan....
scH re-oPenniNG soooonnnn.....
yaY!!!

i mish mY FARHANA......
soBx.....

will upDAte mOre soooooNNNNN..... tyke care peepS.....
tatatatata..................

2007-10-19T20:21:00.000+08:00

siCk....
i tink i caught a cold 2dae...
or mayb i'm just feeling down....
hais..... i dun noe...
all de mood just GONE .....
just like dat....
=(

i'm glad dat he's turning 19 liao....
hope he luv de present....
just 1 favour frm u....
wear dat often....
pWish.....
hais...

2dae was fuN in sKUl....
gt 2 disturb ppl...
lesson was pretty easy....
4 de calculation part onli ..... =)
btw tanx 2 FIR 4 de lolipop.....

i've not be toching my pp @ all....
i'm dEad!!!!
i duN noe hw 2 even start lor even i do haf de template...
cn ani1 seat bside me & guide me....??? soBx2...

LATE!!LATE!!LATE!!!
i'm alwaes late 4 skul.... lols....
my grade will b affected sia... BT...
i just dun noe y i like very slacking sia....
good thing gt ppl pick me up wen i'm really late....
tanx to dat person la lor....

y cn't ani1 understand hw i feel 2wards things......
dun noe wen will my heart give up on hym....
wen will i have a proper life......
alots2 of question are left unanswered in my head....
please ani1 gif me de ans dat i wan... pWish.... sob2..... =(

|*^__cRazY cOupLe kIds *jUfaMaLEe*__^*|