i'm sorry if i made u feel mad or angry....
i noe i'll never fail to make u feel angry ......
but deep down my heart my L.O.V.E for you stays.....
no matter wat happen in the future....
you're my heart and soul.....
i L.O.V.E you.....
jumalee....

hols have started and here i am werking always.....
now i miss going to school.....
classroom filled with laughter of the crazy classmates....
facilitators voice trying to teach us....
long winded 6Ps....
lets take a break till 5 jan next year.....
school reopen with a new year.....
may i'll be rajin to go for lesson....

in a mood of going to the beach....
where the atmosphere is so peace....
the surrounding is cooling....
night wind breeze.....
the sound of the wave from the sea....
taking away all the problems temporary....
enjoy the moment that is so peace and calm....

jumalee...
i'll never stop loving you....
just let time do its job now.....
nth can be done xcept waiting....
get well soon sayang.....
i love you ......
alwaes.....
<3

faeza is lost and nid to find her way back.....
to a place where things goes well enuf....
for her to do soul search....

oh please dun break down now....

sobx2.... =(

tiRed afTer wOrk...

sometime i wonder y must things turn tis wae.....
y cnt dey happen like wat we haf plan before hand....
people saes day arguements is part of it in a relationship...
its and obstacles that will strengthen the relationship that we had...
however too much arguements is frustrating and irritating and hurting...

everytime things goes wrong i'll be wondering.....
what did i do or say wrongly....
did i hurt your feelings.....
am i not listening to u...
thousands and millions of questions coming to my mind.....
but none of the questions had the answer to the questions.....
i wonder why......

keeping quite isnt going to solve things up....
yet it will keep building up dae by day as time flies....
saying it out is something that is healthy to do ....
but its outcome might not be as good.....
wat's left for me to do???
running away .....
dat's all is left in the choice....

life is alwaes unfair....
but we can alwaes make it fair if we want to...
people might think that i'm leading a good happy life...
but you are wrong totally.....
life is complicated....
and it will alwaes b complicated....

there's tons and tons of things that can be learn in life.....
depending on a person for attention that you dream for ....
leading life w/o problems.....
hoping to be pamper .....
to be loVe fuLly.....
by your love oneS.....
sometime it's just a big DREAM that might not come true....
how hard or smart you try....
it wont cum true.....
mayb it will.....
mayb nt....
hais....

i'm in the hols mood now eventhough haven hols yet....
dEe goNna scold me if i kip skipping lesson again and againn...
i'm scared that 1 of my module sangkut...
oh god pleasee help me....
hope that for my elective UT 3 my grade will be at least a C+...
if i get another E i'm dead meat....
another module is that medical tech....
i hate it alot...
2 ut get D and i really hope that I get a C+ or B for 3rd UT....
if not i'm dead for the 2nd time...
thanx god my imaging and equipment is stabil...
hopefully i can get B+ or C for overall grade for that 2 modules.....

dEe is gOnna POP in 8 more days time....
i'm so happy and can't wait for that day to come...
i wanna spend my time with him....
but i'm gonna haf to work tooo...
time planning is important....
i wan to watch movie....

i'm soory if i did something wrong that day...
till you hate yourself badly.,..
i shudnt haf told you that i'll merajok if you never sent me back....
hais... i really hope that you will be ok with her soon...

1 month left to 2009...
counting down...

to believe or not it's up to you but atually i cook for lunch today at home with nurul...hahaha...

so damn random... was really tired and so we skip lesson... came to my house and lepak...

at first i tot of going out and have lunch but since at home might as well cook and eat at home...

saving sikit.. so there's a few dishes that we atually cook today... sweet n sour prawn, fried cabbage, fried can sotong and lastly fried drumlet... ate all this dishes with RICE... since a long time that i didnt cooking food... will update the pictures at the end of the entry..

wen to Lot 1 for a walk to waste time actually... while walking i saw this shop and it sell this cute containers... i love it soo much and there's a frog container too... so decided to buy 1 for me and 1 for myself.... nurul bought her someone tooo.... hehehe... was so happy coz it's damn cute.....

when to had a light dinner with nurul at Ljs.... after that off back home... tmr must go school... if not i'm dead meat....

was supposed to update ytd about the day dEe book in.... he was the IC for that day.... so kental but i'm proud of him though.... but i cant really talk to him coz he's doing his job as an ic....

ohhhh wellll.... his platoon mate was funny when they say like i'm the overall incharge or something.... reason being i was standing infront looking at them... so damn paiseh lor but i dun mind coz i know most of them.... only cant remember all their names... heheh....

ohhh yah.... i just wanna say i'm soooo sorry for being mad and merajoking at you all this while..

i have my own reason and i hope that you try and understand me too orites.... iLy sayang....

still counting down to your POp.... 16 daes left including weekends....

pictures time.....

^ bAybEe and dAydEe ^

the dishes that was being cooked by me and nurul.......


^ sweet and sour prawn ^

^ fried can sotong ^

^ fried cabbage ^

^ fried drumlet ^

oritesss..... i'm done... will update soon.... now i'm waiting for my dEe's messages....have a great day peepS.... Take careeee..... tata.... :P

Don't pretend you're sorry
I know you're not
You know you've got the power
To make me weak inside
And girl, you leave me breathless
But it's okayCuz you are my survival
Now hear me say

I can't imagine
Life without your love
And even forever
Don't seem like long enough

Every time I breathe I take you in
And my heart beats again
Baby, I can't help it
You keep me drowning in your love
Every time I try to rise above
I'm swept away by love
Baby, I can't help it
You keep me drowning in your love

Maybe I'm a drifter
Maybe not
Cause I have known the safety
Of floating freely in your arms
I don't need another life line
It's not for me
Cuz only you can save me
Oh, can't you see

I can't imagine
Life without your love
And even forever
Don't seem like long enough
(Don't seem like long enough yeah)

Every time I breathe I take you in
And my heart beats again
Baby, I can't help it
You keep me drowning in your love
Every time I try to rise above
I'm swept away by love
Baby, I can't help it
You keep me drowning in your love

Go on and pull me under
Cover me with dreams, yeah
Love me mouth to mouth now
You know I can't resist
Cuz you're the air that I breathe

Every time I breathe I take you in
(Cause every time I breathe yeah)
And, my heart beats again
Baby, I can't help it (baby I can't help it)
You keep me drowning in your love
And, every time I try to rise above
I'm swept away by love
Baby, I can't help it
You keep me drowning in your love (ooh, ooh)
Baby I can't help it
You keep me drowning in your love (got me drowning)
oh oh oh

You've got me drowning
You really got me drowning in your love

Baby, I can't help it
Can't help it oh no
(got me drowning)

Cause ever time I breathe I take you in (yes I do)
Then my heart beats again (Oh)
Baby, I can't help it (baby, I can't help it)
Keep me drowning in your love (oh no)
And every time I try to rise above (got me drowning)
I'm swept away by love
Baby, I can't help it
Keep me drowning in your love

dEe sang this song to me and it's so meaningful to me. i'm just so touched when he choose to sing that song to me. thank sayang and your voice is nice to me. SUMPAH tak tipu. hehe...i miss you a lot now a days. being emotional easily and all. getting jealous over something that i shouldnt be. i now i'm being silly that what you say but it's just a rare feeling that i have. like you always ask me whether i'm jealous over some girls and i aways say NO. but that time the feeling of jealousy was so random and i do get irritated over it. but i kept it to myself because i dont want to spoilt your happy mood. thus i prangai kat diri sendiri. it's abit difficult for me to get over that because somehow somewhere inside me there's a feeling of fear loosing you. i don't want to get hurt....

BMT is coming to an end for you sayang.but your other thing is coming up next. i shall not think about it now because i dont want to do something stupid that might unstablise our relationship. i'm starting to count down to the 10 DEC. that will be the most happiest day for me. knowing that you have completed your BMT that is 3 months minus the 2 years of NS. also our 5 months of being together. yeah2.!! after 10 DEC you are left with 1 yrs 9 mths of NS... insyallah we'll get to overcome this 2 years barrier together. i L.O.V.E you....

finishing my polytechnic life soon or shall i say 2 months plus left. that's include the holidays that we're going to have on the 13 DEc. 6 more problems to go and i'm done with diploma. weEeee!!! great or what... hehehhe!!! but i hope that i can continue my studies and take my degree by 2009 july. i'm scared.... but now the important things is that i have to chong for my FYP that is going to due soon. ohh god pleaseeee help me.....

i'm done with the updating i guess... i'll update more when i feel like updating... all the best to those who's taking IPPT this weds... Jia You to all!!!! love ya peeps... muacks!!!!

dun feel good today....mayb because of the new team im having is like irritate me alot.... mayb because i'm falling sick anytime... ytd was having fever and dun feel good at all... on my way to school my tummy prangai... feel like going back home and sleep... but proceed on to school and get to know my team was like no comment... goshhh!!! hopefully nxt week will be a better day for me...

to those whu tot im nt in a good mood or what.... i'm alrite... its just that i'm irritated and dun feel well... so dont think too much la....haira i'm not mad at you at all la dear team leader..... sori if i dun seems to have the mood today alrite....

daydEe i miss you so much.... i haven complete the essay that you ask me to write down.... heheh.... but i did my journal and part of the essay liao.... hehehh... tkde ilham thus never complete it lor....

fyp is giving me a hard time now.... left with only 2 mths or so for us to complete everything...
it's like WTH.... i haven even complete the labview part for the ECG and that will take me sometime especially without any help from that scooby doo... i'm dead... but the happy part is that i manage to do the wireless transmission part... weeeeEE!!! congrats 2 faeza, haira and steven... wahahaha....

i'm soooo sianx now... my stomach is making hell out of noises but i dun feel like eating and that's worst... wat's wrong with me today??? i lost....

been a while i update. kind of busy with things and no mood to upate also. so yah ended up nt updated. hahaha... there's a lot of things that i want to update on la but let me start about last friday.

when to pick my daydEe from jurong east interchange. he book out from there. like kental go discovery centre. haha.... nurul was there toooo... n was supposed to pick scooby doo... but due to miscommunication, both ended up at different places... funny. 1 already in the train while another at the platfrom waiting for the train... hahs.. but at last get to mit that scooby doo laa.... damn blur la he... dun noe how to communicate properly... hehehe... out of no where i ask that scooby doo where he wanna tag along for dinner. haha... he was like orhhh okie can lor... nurul was like huh?!! loSt... hehe... just trying my luck to let dat 2 go out 2gether evnthough with some of us too la...

when to accompany scooby doo to change up and all.. damn slow la but nt so bad compare to my dear daydEe... heeee!! but pity dEe coz he carry his BIG bag around after this camp. dah la penat and i make him more penat.... hais... i'm sorry daydEe... i LOVE u .... the dinner lasted till like 10 plus i guess.... damn late lor coz busy talking about NS life and all... fun though.. made our way back and took train. dEe took cab from UT and when back home after sending me back home... weeeee!!!!

sAturday when to lepak with my daYdee since it have been a LOng time since i spEnd my time with hIm .... after whIch mIT fIrdaUs for at BUGIS... while waiting we had lunch and in a while firdaus caMe.... had some chat with hym and he's make lame jokes and all....hehehhe.... walk into bugis village and have a look at things there... i wanna buy that t-shirt together with dEe....
following that Mus join in... proceed on to Marina Square pizza hut as they have not been there for quite a long time... thus had dinner there while waiting for that Reesha to come and join us....
damn full after dinner and off to esplanade to lepak.... wahahaa.... long time never go there sia... daydEe no time to bring me there.... saded... :(( took pictures together and telling jokes ... calling each other names.... heheh... dat's fun lor.... off to mrt ... gt smth happened that make me scared. was damn scared till dEe hug me close to him and told me not to see... just dont know why is there such person in this world.... hais.... ohhh welll... tanx dEe for sending me home.....
ILy jUmalEe....

sUndaY we had breakfast cum LunCh together before he bOOk in bacK agaIn.... after which went shoppIng to buy his camp things.... den off to take his big bag... time is up!! sobX2... :((
watever it is or how long it takes i'll always wait for you daydEe... reason beIng yOu're just my daYdEe....!! luV ya alOt....

that was all about last wks' and for this wk will be the same.... he's in camp and having field camp and all... as for me is only school and lepaking with my friends.... how i wish dEe is here now by my side.... haisSss... :((( 1 more dae to go and dEe will be back!!!! yIpEee!!!!
i reallY miss hIm aloT ..... i niD u saYang here with me..... sobx2 :(((

waiting for my daydEe to msg.....
9.30pm liao still haven admin...
tick tok tick tok tick tok.....
sianxing as always....
gt nth to do....
hais....

hope dat he can book out dis sat....
if nt saddening for me coz i cnt mit hym for like 2 wks....
oh my god!!!
i'll just fill up my day with working and working and working.....
no mood also to go jln raya w/o dEe around....
y must dat people be so strict....
hate confinements 2 de core...
hais....

daydee....
i mish u alot la syg....
can i spend time with you....
i'll always pray for ur health and safety....
cpt2 la POP so not so bad i suppose ............
i wanna tell u smth dat i wan u 2 alwaes rmbr....
u're the onli one that i alwaes tink and keep in my heart...

iLy....

haira kecik....
must jia you for ur math olevels....
make sure u pass this time round....
wish u all de best....
dun b so stress up with FYP coz olevel oso IMPT....
try 2 manage ur own time orites my dear....
i'll try 2 help and do my part as ur team members...
& also as ur FWN.....
tyke care girL....

i'm bored sooooo damn bored lor.....
so decided to blog....
dusty liao la.....
hahaha....

been skipping class so many time liao....
elective onli came for 2 time onli...
sum more gt UT le.....
pandai sia dis girl...
struggling....

i wan to go jlN raya....
faster le people....
i wan 2 go out...
please3....
nk duit raya frm haira....
yeah2....

love my daydee many many.....
i'm sorry if i alwaes make u angry....
hais.....

meow meow meow meow.....
meow meow meow meow meow meow.....
muackS....!!!!

i wanna hug n kiss frm u......

i mIsH my deAr jUmalEe alots....
counTing dwN frM nW tiLL 28 sEpt...
10 more daes to go ....
tIme pLs flY fasTer......
i REallY Mish mY daYdEe...

PleaSe2 lEt me hAve hyM 4 mYselF....
soBx2....

few days left for me....
feel so sad wen i noe he haf 2 go...
doing something that he shud be doing...
having no choice for hym to choose from...

cnt imagine hw life is after sudden change....
without any preparation done before hand....
doing things all alone without you by my side...
de feEling iS iNcoMplete....

everytime i stared straight into ur eyes....
it really hurt me alot....
as i noe dat i cant be doing it animore...
randomlY i'll just move forward to u & hug u tiedly...
as if i dun even wan 2 let u go aniwhere far away from me...
kiss u on ur liPs and whisper to ur ear,"i lOve yOu".....
dat's alwaes the things dat i do wen i feel dat i nid u 2 noe ....
i'm scared dat i cant change to de surrounding that is going 2 square 1....

daydEe...
since the first time i noe u, i can feel dat we can be more den a friend...
even before we met up i've gt dis feeling dat i somehow like ur character...
de way u msg me is different from others....
i feel comfortable being with you....
dat's y i decided to met u for de 1st time...
no regrets mitting u eventho' ......
having fun teasing u....
laughing.....
it was hell of joyful moments dat i haf with you syg....
i just hope dat dis wun stop because of anithing...
BUT it have to come to an end for the time being...
tOO fast for me to even spend de veRi last mOments wif my daydEe....
but why must it be so fast....
haisss.......

something that i wanna tell u is that.....
i wun leave u alone wen u nid me....
i'll wait for u no matter what ....
my LoVe 4 u'LL nvr Fade....
daT'S my pRomise 2 u....

haiRA must chOng for FYP,...
cYa later....

Relief....

tanx god dat mamat nvr turn up....
for wat reason i dun ever care at all...
what i noe is that abviously he's MCM paHam....
belo nye budak....
suke hati kau la mamat....
as long as he've stop disturbing my life....
i'm happy coz i gt no time to entertain all dis ppl...
waste my precious time on things that is stupid 4 wat rite...

2day was de 1st lesson for 3yrs 2semester.....
left with afew mnths and i'm done wif poly life....
bt i've sooo de veri stress up with the modules and fyp...
dat's enuf to kill me over the next 16 month in this school....
class today was fun as my team members was superb de duperb...
kept laughing and giggling over things and making fun of the things...

opposite class was haira's class....
the KAMPONG MELAYU KLASS...
hahahaha.... lots n lots of melayu there...
dun noe how's de hell did haira endure in her class...
confirm frustrating coz of thier irritating attitudes and actions....
n beside my class was the WAK TANJONG KLASS....
wat i heard is that there's alot of minah tudung there....
veri funny lor.....
hahaha....

a few days left for me to be with daYdEe....
cnt imagine hw's life w/o hym out of the sudden...
everyting nid 2 depend on myself....
taking care of myself.....
i dun even noe whether i can do dat....
i'm just use 2 b taken care of...
sOb2.

ILY MANY2 JUMALEE......

i luV u daYdeE....
random gIler....
hahaha....

wen 2 watch baybeats wif my dear crazy claN....
cOnsiSting of NuruL, yaNa,fEe2 and nt 2 4get mY dEar dEe....
hahaha.... oooHhh yah... pLus jUb coZ yaNa waS dere wat....
oooHHh weLL...
reaLLy enJoy mYselF eventHough tIred....
beeN staNdinG siNce 11am tIll 11pM....
12 hRs oF staNdin can diE le...
hahahaha.......
nasiB gt mY daYdEe daT cN lyN my kaRenah wEn i'M tired....
yeah2....

& yah nt 2 4get i dUn liKe 2 sHaRE my daYdEe wif otheR ppL...
sO fEe2 toOOoo bAd....
hahaha......

goNNa slP liAo....

2 all de mUsliM pEople dat's menYambut-inG buLan pUase....
sLamat berpuAse.......
jGn poNteng2 tau....
tuHAn maRAh...
nt gOOd....
hehe...
tata..

sadDening.....

tanx u soo much 4 tell me dat ....
nw den i noe dat de truth is....
everything is laid out infront of me nw...
truth really hurt me alot.....
i've wasted my time being attached all dis while...
with sum1 dat DOESNT EVEN APPRECIATE ME.....
MANUSIA MCM NI PUN ADER.....
shall just put dis bullshit aside n lupekn....
treating it as if it nvr happenned......
easy 2 sae den doing rite....
but i shAll trY.....
wif dE heLp frM my loVe onEs.....
esPeCiallY dEe....
luV yA sYg....

enuf if pasRah-inG....
bacK 2 my hyPer side....
laTer goIng seNtOsa wiF my CrazY clAn & daYdEe...
yeaH2....
hOpe Dat i'LL haF fuN wiF my dEe...
nK take pIcS many2...
yeah2...
luV ya dEe...

i misH -inG u sOoo de mUch....
muAcks!!!

feel like blogging....
random feeling....
so yah....
here am i typing....

hmmm.....
wat telah happen to my taggy board....
tsk2 cian my taggy.....
tk bersalah.....
i dun noe wat's de motive of dat DIN...
ape tah die dpt from doing all dis crapping thingy....
2 la org suro cari keje yg afdal tknk.... ungkal..... nk jgk buat keje yg tk berfaedah....
gasak kau la mamat....
jgn nanti things get worst den nk menyesal sudah....

to by dear daydee....

luV ya soooooo deeee muccchhh....
muackssss.....!!!!!
watever happen u'll alwaes b wif me....
dun alwaes get angry easily okie....
nanti kene jual aru tau....
hahaha....

counting down to our 2mths.....
yeah2....
cpt seh time flies....
den time for u 2 go NS is coming soon ....
cnt denied dat oso la....
bt i tink that i wanna tell u is dat i'll wait 4 u no matter wat...
i wanna u 2 go wif a clear mind ....
dun tink of unnecessary things coz i noe wat 2 do...
i wun do ani stupid things nor unnessary things.........
luv ya.....

if can for the first few wks of the fasting daes....
i wanna break fast wif you....
realli i wanna dat to happen.....
coz i wan 2 spend the time left wif u....

seriously i'm gonna mish u like hell....
iLuvyou dear daydee.....
muacks....

c ya later syg....
assalamualaikum.... =)

lost....
things dun really goes smoothly nowadaes....
i'm nt sure y but mayb dere's a reason behind it....
however i just hope that things will goes back to normal soon...
.cnt really stand being in this situation for a long time like dis...
i like my bestie's new look...
she looks cute wif dat new hair style...
wait till she wear her new spectacle and she'll look totalli different....hahaha,....
i oso wanna do my hair la like dat,...mcm best plk uh perm hair rite....ohhh welll.....hahaha...

dis irritating guy really pissing me off wif his tagging...
nonsences totalli nonsences lor dis guy....
really gt nth to do....
thus decided to disturb ppl....
hais...
manusia mcm gini pun ader...
ya allah....
ape lah nk jadi dgn dunia ni...
seriousli if u really gt smth against me den sae,...
dun cari pasal wif other ppl....
just cum straight to the point n tell me whu's de hell is u....
n wat's exactli u wan....

today smth funny happened....
was going 4 tuition @ sembawang n daydee sent me dere,...
wen up to 10 story and daydee passby de house....
my student was shocked for no reason when she saw me...
den de mum ask me whether i scared of lizard or nt...
i was like stund...
i'm scared too...
geli 2 de max....
eeeeeeeeeeeeee...
so decided to called daydee up 2 kill de lizard...
wat's funny is dat de lizard was damn small..
wahahahahahaha......
daydee spray de baygon maham byk giler seh...
.de mum was like standing damn far frm de kitchen window....
hahaha...
i onli step nt scared nt actualli penakot oso...
after a lot of spraying, de lizard commit sucide....tsk2....
da mati liao
yeah2.... irsyaad2 bdae cuming soon...chey2 nk msk 18yrs old nmpk....watever it is we'll celebrate same2 wif adek ok...
doned.... lastly, i wanna sae dis:
daydee, i luv u loads n i hope dat we'll last long till biler2...regardless whether we gado or nt...i'll still luv u ....tyke care daydee...muacks....

daydee ku' syg

sejak pertame kali ku lihat kamu....
my heart beat fast....
wat i can sae is i like u frm de start....
but i just dun trust on love @ 1st sight...
thus i decided to b a fwn of urs....
frm a stranger2 to a friend....
it doesnt stop there for some reasons...
daes after daes....
wks after wks...
the feeling develop bit by bits till i noe that u're de 1 i wanna be wif....

the strange things is that i didnt even think abt my x wen i'm wif u...
sumthing that is rare bt true...
life nid 2 move on...
yeah2...
so yah...
here am i ....
being wif my dear mr JUMALEE....
spending every single time wif hym...
just so happening and nvr fail to make me smile...
de moments was wonderful...
nvr xpect dat 2 turn out like dat...

10 july 2008....
a dae that witness us....
de joy, happiness cnt really b describe in words....
reason being it's something special taking place in our life...
both were no longer single bt instead being part of each other...

1o aug 2008...
1 dae after national dae...
1 mth for us being together as 1...
lots of TESTs we're gone thru'...
together as 1 we solve it...
in a good waes for sure...
cuz no matter hw we argueed...
we'll cum back 2 each other..
cuz i cnt bear to seperate frm u...
i luv u syg.....

nw that we've gone thru' almost 2 mths....
i hope that we've learnt how 2 change...
for the better...
n i noe u did dee....
i appreciate it....

bet lots of things gonna happen....
be it a test or wat...
i'm nt sure...
wat i noe i nid u 2 b by my side alwaes...
no matter wat...
my love wont change for no reason...
baybee will alwaes love u daydee...
muacks....

bOOoo.... updating bout the trip dat i wen on weds....
wen to TEKONG... nice place i can sae... but the ferri was sucks..
make me feel like vomitting.... hais...

upon reaching dere, wat i can see was alot2 of abg2 KATAK.... WAHAHAHA...
but super de duper de hot la dere... cnt tahan bt still have 2 endure...
wen to de auditorium to have a talk by the people dere...
gd thing we sat at the top part.... cuz yana slp thru out the speech... wahahaha....
funny sia... suddenli shut down system...

after speech ended...gt dis one cute guy came and was holding dis yellow flag.....
yana & nurul was like ," eh2.. yellow2.... gi kt yg yellow nye... melayu2...." haha...
bt actualli we are supposed 2 go 2 de yellow flag guy... wahahaha... belo....
one thing i dun like dat guy was he's unfriendly type of person la....
ppl talk 2 hym buat bolyn... kn da kene lable pekak... 2 bad...

nxt was de part that they intro us the NS things... like bags & etc.....
dat guy was cute too though but daydee cuter la... hahaha...
crap... haha... but he talk super de funny.... tk tipu lor.... wahahaha....
i guess he short tongue uh... but cute enuf liao lor... so i gif hym dis nick name....
MR SHORT TONGUE... or in short... MR S ..... haha... cute rite...
haira... since u wanna dat guy rite... suitable 4 u oso... short but cute... hehee...
mcm paham jer.... peaceee....

de tawafing ard tekong was damn tired... mcm nk pitam... coz weather hot den kept going in & out of air-con rooms... cn die liao.... hahaha... but the veri2 best & fun part that i like was the shotting .... i mish shooting sia... dpt lepas kn rindu dat dae.... holding riffle....
de feel was fun .... been 3 yrs i guess.... rindu beb.... hahaha...
nurul cn sae pro jgk eh shooting... hahaha... hidden talent btl la bdk ni... hahaha.....
but de cutest one was yana.... she shoot veri cute... den complain hand pain la dis la dat la....
hahaha... funny lor she... hahaha.. dat's my adik hahah...

last was de home sweet home part.... yeah2.... dat was de best coz all da tired... hahaha...
plus hungry.... headed to changi airport... popeye.... hahaha... had dinner den wen for tuition...
so de duper de tired lor... dat's de end of the whole dae journey... yay!!!

cum to tink abt tekong... just feel down abit la... de time for hym to go is approching nearer and nearer... i'm nt totalli prepared 4 dat... going tuition alone... going back frm skul alone...
no nite chatting.... no hugesss and gud nite kisses... ish222.... cane eh... hais....

daydeee.... i just love u and only u......

FYP presentation is doNed for dis semester....
weeeEEE.... coNgRates 2 eveRyone.....
especially mY team memBers,...

just dun understand y all this happen....
it's like sumtime i tink that it's difficult to trust sum1....
especially when they haf alot of history dat still exists....
it's not a BIG deal though....
watever it is lets fate decide la hor.....

hopefully bestie is alright now....
i'm sorry i cant help u much....

confusion taking over now.....

i dun know what I'm doing is right or not.....

please faeza don't hurt people that is innocent....

think and ask yourself what you want in life now....

ask yourself that and you'll know what you want in life...

don't throw tantrum at someone that doesn't deserve it....

because it's very wrong.....

goshhhh!!!....

what's happening to me???

not being myself now....

will be back soon enough when things get back to normal....

take care people....

Ily dee.....

yay!!! at last i cn log into my bloggy....
i wan 2 update alot alot alot of things le....
but let me start by stating that i'm attached....
yes!! i'm attach 2 a guy by de name of JUMALEE.....
i just wish dat it will last long....
i cnt bear 2 be hurt 4 the third time....

life is simple nwadaes bt happening....
wif my clans ard and my dear....
dey really make my dae....
i'm back 2 my own self....
yes2 i am.....
weeeee....

nw a get to noe the truth....
but wat different does it make???
been waited for like mths.....
but i'm jst left wif nth but 2 guess it myself....
trying my best 2 make u smile...
coz i love it when i c dat smile on ur face....
i was damn dwn wen you start emoing...
jst wish dat i can take away all ur probs...
but it's beyond my limit....
i tried to help but u reject it....
wat's more i can do other den trying to talk 2 u.....
time passes by and things getting nmrl...
bit by bit i cn feel dat de emo side of u is gone....
de smile dat i've been waiting have finally came...
super happy .....
but smth bothering me....
wat will happen if u noe de truth....???
i dun wanna be a steal,....
dat steal de smile and joy frm u....
i felt bad abt myself...
hurting people....
gosh....

things happen eventually.....
but dat was 2 soon....
u admitted de truth....
but it wont make a different...
instaed i feel akward....
i'll miss all de things....
hw am i supposed 2 face de future ???

didnt wen 4 skul...
was quite wierd as i didnt alight @ wdlds....
wen sumwhere 2 clear my mind...
wasnt in de rite mind.....
tinking wat will happen nxt....
i break dwn...
for no reason....
i'm nt ignoring u or avoiding....
i just feel different,....
jst dun understand y...
cnt u jst convince me.....
i loose hope.....

dis is wen story started.....

morning people.....

thinking what have been happening to my life....
people around emo-ing....
keeping quite.....
but why??
what happen to my clan people...??
where's my abg & adik???
where's syafiq??
where's khaty???
where's boboy??
where???
drifting bit by bit....
4 what reason??
i'm not sure...
i miss all de moments....

deep inside me....
de feeling of guiltiness is growing...
every time..... every moments......
hais.....

wanna say thank you...
for loving me for who i am....
entertaining my crazyness & attitude....
you mean so much to me.....
but I'm sorry because problems kept poping....
insyallah it'll end sooonnnn.....

choices nid to be made....
be it good or bad...
take a risk....

2 choices in my mind....
- moVe on & be happy
- sTay sadedning....

hais...
no one choose 2 b sad alwaes....
it's all de matter of u wan or nt....

coNfusion.....

60% of kesabaran left.....
decreasing bit by bit...
day by day...
goSh....

nt being myself nowadaes....
kiping quite.....
stone-ing....
being too crazy & irritating....
dat realli nt me....
hais....

cnt concentrate doing things....
my mind jst dun function as normal....
like jst nw...
chat wif my dear yana bt i type things dat's in my mind...
random....

2 my brother zaki.....
tanx for being so concern abt me...
appreciate it very the much...
& making me laugh all de wae during the breakouts....

nw i feel like smoking....

tiredness...
just got back home.....
wkends was fun 4 me.....
mit fah for the 1st time...
nice guy .... funny.... cute....
dat's my 1st impression for hym la...
hmmm....

been tinking abt wat mus said ytd....
mayb dis shud end sooner or later....
he feels bad n so do i....
but i just dun wan 2 hurt ppl's feelings....
i noe hw it feels wen dat happens....
gosh.... dilemma seh....
watever it is...
i respect ur decision la daddy....
as long as ure happy....
i'll try 2 b hapi 2...
insyallah.....

dis question suddenli pop-up in my mind....
haf i really move on frm hym ???
y cnt i just sae a 'YES' wen ppl ask???
wat's wrong wif me???

a few more minutes syafiq turning 19 liao....
hopefully he like the present and the small celebration ...
was quite rushing la....
poor planning but end up to be a nice one....
will update some of the pictures later....
hehehe.....

lab was fun.... hahaha...
did experiments that i myself dun understand...
hahaha... funny rite,....
but i can help max write the report... LOL...
took pic wif adelyn n my haira....
funnnnn!!!

y must he show temper to ppL whu's nt at fault??
hais.... nearly broke down just bcoz of hym...
he just me feel as if i make a mistake....
tried 2 comfort hym but failed....
i just let hym be like that....
effort nt appreciated....
sadedning.....

breaking down since he msg me ytd....
once a while i just feel like crying....
he alwaes sae,"pegi la cari pengganti...."
does he have feeling??? or is he so damn heartless??

asalamualaikum.....

here i wanna sae dat....
i'm sori for avoiding ppl ....
but it's just so complicated....
i'm still a fwn of ur for sure......
dat's wat i can ensure you alwaes....

feel so bad for make ppl feel so small....
dat's y i hate 2 hurt pple's feeling....
feels so bad doing dat...
but wat i can do??
dat's life & i nid 2 adapt 2 it...

'berhenti mengharap'.....
dis phrase realli remains me of the past....
yah... realli i does....
i still do miss hym sometime....
hais...

will time heel de wounds???
it's true???

deadlY tirEd . . . . . . .

coNfusioN . . . . .

dEad . . . .

lOst . . . . . .

bOOOoooOO!!!!

1stli i'm soooo de soRi dat thIngs gOes wrOng jst nw....

i'll maKe it uP oTey oNe dae....

2ndlI i had a GreAt time 2Dae gOin oUt wiF mY HI-6 cLan...

hehe.. nIce naMe hUh... uNiqUe....

aniWae... wen fUnAn 2 haF diNNer....

den weN 2 HaF beN & jeRRy afTer daT....

heaVen!!!!

afTer whIch weNt esPlanaDe 2 LEPak....

ramai sIak mat REp... reMas dOk...

hahaha....

kepT takiNg piCs here n DerE,...

fuNN !!!

bUt thOse piCs mUsrt waIt 4 nUruL 2 uPloAd....

" NURUL CPT LA UPLOAD!!!"

oVeralL... i juSt love dIs pIc... nIce!!!!

DAT'S YANA & FAEZA.....

camat pagy peoPle!!!!

tyke care......

bYe.....!!

areNt being myself nwadeas....

halF oF me is nT here....

missIng somethin bit by bit....

but i'm not sure wat it is....

hais....

assalamualaikum to all....
hahaha....
was slacking @ home all de wae.....
sian la sial!!!
i wanna go out wif haira....
girl....!!! dun 4get our date dis fri....
hahaha....

wen out 2 mit bestie....
miss her lots....
talk abt peribahase dat she herself gt it wronng...
so funny la her.....
eventhough it was jst a while i do treasure it.... =)

at last i noe wat's happening....
good thing it was settle....
1 less thing to tink abt nw....

random thoughs...
i miss going 2 skul nw....
miting my fwns & faciS....
crazy-ing wif my cLans...
lepak-ing wif them...
talking craps....
disturbing ppl.....
gosh....
=(

pelik la FAEZA!!!!
ape kene tah ni bdk....
tsk2....
mayb bcoz of de fever dat i had dis morning....
i dun wanna fall sick pleaseeee!!!

kept missing hym dis few daes....
random siak FAEZA!!!!!!!!
wat does dat mean den???
wat haira sae might be true but....
nta la... tk perlu seh ni smue....
dun wan to spoilt wat i haf nw by all dis stupid things....
nt worth after all...
hais....
dis is sux... bodoh la...!!!!
can i just act as if nth happen??
till wen can i endure all dis & lying 2 myself ni FAEZA???
haiyooo!!!!
or shud i just dump dat feeling into de laut dlm2...??
hmmmm....
tink faeza tink tink!!!!
sob2....

saded!!! i mish eating my ben n jerry ice cream..... =(
can i have dat on fri PWISH HAIRA!!!
hahahaha....

ohhhh yah.....
y mst i gado wif hym??
wat a question he posted 2 me seh....
i'm so de innocent le...
god pleasee!!!
i dun wan dat 2 happen....
small kid scared....

nid 2 slp earli le...
if nt he'll nag n nag @ me...
hehehe....
camat mlm....!!!

decided to blog at this time....
I LUV DIS PICX & I LUV MY ADEQ HAIRA 2!!!!
hahaha... took dis @ ben n jerry nye kedai...
had my fav ice cream.... YUMMY2!!!!
den as per nrml lepak wif my dis giler fwn of mine...
crappin & laughing....
onli us making hell out of noise dere...
take picx was de best part lor....
den back 2 wdlds 4 tuition....

lol.... goshh... i'm werking later yet haven slp...
FAEZA!!! wat's de hell happening to u????
dun emo2 la faeza.... tsk2....
smth just doesnt goes rite for me.....
de feeling is so de nt good....
ani1 cn jst tell me y???
sobx2.....


been working all dis while.... keje2 till naik mendak seh.... bt wat to do.... rather den rotting...
so yah.... here am i werking non stop.... bt gt money later 2 shop2.... wEE!!!!
2dae was a shockin dae 4 me coz my DADDY came 2 mit me @ workplace....
been awhile dat i met hym n jst nw i really was happy 2 mit hym lor....
bt rite it's just so complicated la..... damn confusing.....
dat's wen confusion occurs.....
hahah...
MEREPEK LA FAEZA....!!!!

life startin 2 get more painful n irritating at times....
like wat my DADDY sae i'm just nt readi 2 accpt ppl....
bt in my heart i tink i've found some1 dat fit it my heart....
BUT.....
mayb it might not be de right person....
i just scared to be hurt again ....
trust me... i'm TIRED!!!

dae after dae i'm missing something in my life....
de feeling of incompletance is alwaes dere....
n it's sux 2 de max,....

sometime i just sit n thought for a moment...
wat i wan i life.....???
since wen is faeza an emo kid...???
adakah silapku untuk menyintai dirimu??
will dere be hope or shud i just dun bother abt it???

i wonder.....
all left unwritten....
damn it!!!

will i be able to leave evey single past of mine behind and look at de bright side nw???
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
onli god noes it.....

happy reading okie adeq.... n camat pagi 2 u...!!! =)

uPdatIngggGGG.....

hahaha... gonNa sHare thIngs that happen LaSt week.....

let me start bY sayIng "THANK YOU ABG ZAKI 4 DE LOLIPOPS....!!!"

after uT wen 4 a 'SIBLING DATE' @ airport....

hahaha.... wen for dinner 1st coz i veri hungry.....

den wen tour ard airport....

from T3 to T1 @ last ....

was daMn tired la....

walk2 till lOSt coz dun nOe where de viewiNg mall daT i alWaEs gO.....

hahaha... tanx eh aBg for mAking me seSat aRd airpOrt...

liKe tOurisT sIA.... hahaha

tOOk sO maNy maNy manY piCs @ de sKy tRain & alsO tRainss.....

sOOOoooo daMn fuN la TiLL tK iGt nK baLIk... hahaha...

verY verY selDom 2 get 2 sPend tIme wiF my dIs bRothEr la....

bz all De waY... hahahaha....

aFter a vEry lOng2 daE..... we decIded 2 gO hOme.... wEEeee!!!..

HAPPY DAE FOR ME.!!!!!

diS piCs i EdiTed fOr mY bRo.... mUst cOmMeNt wHich 1 nIce oK abg....

hahahaha.... best 4 fotoS dat i Like....

mon 26/5 was abg zaki's burfdae offically......

was so damn happi coz he's turning 20 yrs old n i'm onli 2 yrs old....

wahahahaha!!!!!

bought for hym slice of ice-cream cake & also a shirt....

hope u reallY like it....

sooooo de sorry i didnt wrap the pResent up for you abg.....

& also it does not turn 2 be dat fun la....

hais....

but i really hope u enjoy ur dae & de time we went ouT la.....

ABG!!!! 'GILER!!!' HAHAHAHAH......

dat's all i guess for nw....

will update soon abt Other things...

nw like no tiMe hahaha...

1 mOre thing....

FAEZA DUN SLACK ANIMORE....!!!

i'm scared of my fyp cnt dooooo!!!.....

haiRa tanx you for being dere weN i in nEEd of sum1.....

lUv you....

tata....

HAPPY 20TH BURFDAE LOST KID.....

hahaha.... @ last i'm like 2YRS OLD.... tsk2....

wanna blog alot2 of things....

dis yr's burfdae is de special yet saddening one....

have been blowing candles for like 3 time....

WEEEEEEeee!!! really had so much fun dis few daes....

had celebration @ workplace wif my dear viVian on de 19th may....

hahaha... she bought alot2 of food.... cakes..... donuts..... hahaha....

all my fav bt i cnt eat everything!!! hahaha...

dis is de cake dat she bought 4 me.....

hahaha... nxt was on tues.... i was surprised dat my E44a classmates

made dis celebration for me....

awwwww!!! i'm so touched by their actions....

thank you IRSYAD for planning dis.....!!!

dis's my 2nd cake frm my e44A pEEps.....

back to my E25H class..... dey wishes me.....

isHak sanG dis burfdae song 2 me.... tanx you....

weds was my big dae.... hahahaha.... so damn happi...

but i noe dat i wun be dat happy coz something wont be going as planned.....

hais.... i just dun wan dat 2 happen.... but i cnt do anithing....

goSh... oh well.....

had lunch wif anwar, sean, gf & syahril....

was really fun spending time wif them.....

laugh and laugh and laugh till stomach painnn......

den wen back 2 sch coz my abg call me back....

spend time wif them and suddenli cake pop up.....

and guess wat... my fav oreo ice-cream cake...... waahhhH!!

took alot2 of pIc derE wiF mY dear pEEpS....

i'LL uPdate it wen mY dear nUrul pass it 2 Me.....

was beIng sabO by aLL..... loLs.....

fUn.... bUT my face all kena cake and i smell like OreO icecream cake....

hahahahah.....

after all de saboing n pLayin..... we jst lepak dere....

den disturb ppL till i nVr go 4 de fOto taking n BaCk 2 lab....

hahaha.....

after skul wen 2 VIVO CITY...... weeeEEE!!!

play water dere.... n get wet frm head 2 toe...... saded....

tanx 2 anwar n sean lor.....

de saddening part happen @ roof top bt i shall nt sae it....]

so sad n still feeling so dwn bcoz of dat.....

y is FAEZA so bad n do all dis 2 him....???

tsk2....

ard 10pm we went off frm vivo....

tanx anwar 4 sending me home..... hahahaha....

really had fun on dat dae.....

wen my 2nd sis reach home.... she brought cake home...

wOw!!! another cake 2 go.... hahhaa

we cut de cake n had a piece each coz nite areadi.....

canot eat 2 much @ nite.... hahahaha....

so damn touched wen dey sang burfdae song 2 me.....

love u so much la sistaZ.....

dis wAs my anoTher cake......

hahaha....

2 all dat make my BIG dae a special one......

i would like 2 sae...

"thank you"......

love u guys alot2.....

n haira..... thank 4 de DALE.....

abg zaki.... tmr we'll go out orites.....

will update soon.... tc.....

back to update about things

dat have been taken place...
been doing alot of thinking....
FYP.... SINGLE LIFE.... FWNS....

UTS.... DAILY GRADES..... FAMILY....
gosh..!! cn go crazy sia....
cn i haf a break frm PROBS please.....
cn i haf some1 2 tok 2 about all dis things??
where's my CHIP & DALE goooo???
i mish u guys by my sides....
i cnt take care of myself....
PLEASE CUM BACK...
*crying*...

been a good time wen i'm wif the 'GILER' gRp...
dey really try 2 make me happi especially dat

care bear n also my dearest abg & gile khaty....
life isnt boring wif them ard....
giler -ing.... belo-ing.... disturbing..... fun though ....
still sometime i tend 2 breakdwn....
dere's still emptyness in me....
tried very2 hard 2 replace it bt i jst cnt....
IMPOSSIBLE.....

turning 20 in 8 more daes i guess....
cnt believe it i'm alreadi 20.....
OHHH NOOOO!!!!.....
hahahha.....
i got 1 wish dat i wanna wish for my burfdae....
[[[ PLEASE2 LET ME HAF C&D BY MYSIDE...]]]
dat's de onli thing dat'll make me happi.....

going for a date wif my 'abg' on de 23 may.... weeeee!!!!
hope dat it'll be funnnn......
yeahhhhh!!!..
abg!!!! i wan 20 presents!!!!!
lol.....

gD morning every1.....!!!!

i'm sooo tired of crying nW.....
will you even rmbr abt me animore??
will you ??
will you???????

HIDUPPENUHDGNTANDATANYA.................

.........................................................

a WanNa RuN aWay fRm aLL dIs....

aWay fRm everYtHin....

loTs and loTs of things taking Place dIs daes.....
be it good or bad....
been a long time since i'm updating dis blog....
hahaha....
been bz wif tuition and working...
damn fun la making myself bz with things......

fyp is so damn stressing for me...
one thing oso i haven do....
die la...
5th week must do report...
i'm totalli dead coz i'm totalli lost...
gosh....

turning 20 soon..
haha....
i wish i cn spend time wif my bestie la.
simply mish her alot2...
been wondering whether she's doing fine or nt....
hopefulli she's happy wif her fwns and all....

sometime life dun alwaes go as what we alwaes planned....
mayb dat's reason for that la...
but most of the time it's just as complicated as possible....
learn alot of things for life.....
just that sometime i just dun understand something...
why must things just goes that way bt not this way....

orites.... i'm done here....
update soon when i feel like updating....
to bestie if u nid sum1 just cum to me orites...

assalamualaikum.... =)

just dun noe y ppl nwadaes very de bz body...
kalah kn pompuan....
hais...
watever it is....
i wun bother 2 entertain all dis nonsence ppl...
dah tkde keje lain agak nye....

oh welll....
dry run was preety fun ytd....
yet damn tired..
i injurd my hand... gosh...
very pain lor....
cnt even carry box during working time...
still gt 1 more dry run 2 goo....
die la...

was fun coz i gt 2 mit more ppl...
like de yr 2s...
crazy yet fun bunch of freaks...
had dinner wif dem...
den was late 4 tuition....
hahaha... as usual la...
puntualiti prob...
hahaha..

lappy giving me a very hard time now...
kept hanging here n dere...
fucking irritating....
aiyo....
mintak kene campak jer tau lappy ni...
hais...

da la....
stop here...
tyke care peeps...

wadsup dere....
been so bz till no time to update...
so nw taking a bit of my time updating....

been tired dis few dates eversince having tuition....
werkin in de morning till ard 6pm den off for tuition....
damn tiring but i'm just use to it lor...
furthermore gt nth 2 do oso...

sch is reopening soon...
i realli tot it was 14 april but nah...
it's 7 april...
gosh...
so fast...
haha...

mish my fwns alot2....
my dear abg... nurul.... akbar... my classmates...
i jst wanna spent time wif dem while i'm nt werkin...
bt i dun noe whether dey're free or nt...
oh well...
just hope 2 c dem wen sch reopen den....

noe wat...
sumtime i've been tinking...
y ppl frm de past cuming back in my life...
for me i felt hapi coz dey're here again 2 complete my life...
but in other hand... i jst feel scared...
dat i'll loose dem again...
it's nt easy 2 4get sum1 though..
hais...

watever it is....
i'll not repeat de mistake again...
for de 3rd time...

ohhh well...
i mish my bestie...

gtg... kena ask 2 go bed nw...
gd nite...
=)

dun understand y all dis is happening....
been wondering....
wat am i doin rite nw is wat i realli wan ....
or just sumthin 2 lie 2 myself...
hais....

starting 2 tink abt life nwadaes....
nt's nt easy....
in fact it cn cause us regrets if we do a TINY mistake....
coz time wont come back....

been bz-ing wif work all dis daes....
plus having tuitions on mon n thurs...
haha... pretty fun though despite de tiredness...
i jst cnt imagine myself rotting w/o doin anithin...

wen for movie wif my dear vivian, welson and also syikin...
hahaha,... watch jumper.... kind of nice n funny show...
no regrets watching it... infact we realli enjoy it...
was realli glad coz i'm de one whu choose 2 watch dat... hahaha
wen ard shopping.... in n out of shops..... here n dere....
hahaha... bought sumthin 4 my sis... hope she realli like it though it's nt dat xpensive 2 her...

just hope dat everything goes fine for de ppl in my past...
kind of missing them...
bt i mst accpt it dat once dey are gone, dey wont cum back...
ohhhh wellll.... im saded....

cnt wait for the SEG camp... weeeee!!! hopefulli i gt a good n sporty team....
most of all i wanna enjoy myself....
b4 starting my FYP... hahahah....
result is out on 20 feb..
gosh...
i'm scaredddd.....

i'm stopping here....
tyke care ....
tata....

booo!!
hahaha... back 2 update dis bLog....
just change de skin after a long long long time....
i'm just bored la...
so yah...
n i've new tagbox...
coz i 4got my userID n password 4 de cbox....
stm rite me...
oh well...

skul haf cum 2 an end... as in 2nd year... hahaha...
hols is takin place....
meaning i nid 2 werk 4 de whole dae...
if nt i'll b deadli bored doin nth @ home...
hahaha... gonna mish my classmates...
bt cn alwaes mit dem when gt time ...
like wat my abg wan sae... hahaha....

wen 2 bestie's sch just nw.....
had dinner wif her....
pass her some things....
hope dat she's happy n doing fine....
after which mit sis n accompany her 4 dinner...
btw towie 4 being late.... hahaha....

i just wonderin wen will things going 2 b normal...
as if me able 2 be happy & nt lost animore....
biler la mase2 2 akan dtg....
hais...
sometime i'm just tired... sick n tired of all dis...
being hurt alwaes.....
bosan 2 de max...
just hate life being like dis....
how i wish de stars can show me de wae out frm all dis mess....
haiz....

people cum n go every single time....
be it for good or bad..
but sumtime i wonder...
ani reason 4 dat....
yes?! .... no?!....
just left unwritten...
in my heart...

life isn't same as wat i use to have....
things change.....
be it the people... surrounding....
been tinkin all dis while...
asl eh org slalu menyakitkn hati ssorg tanpa sebab yg btl..
just dun get it.....
daes after daes..
i just find dat smue laki same jer prangai...
mayb i'm streotyping la...
but must of the guys do haf the same attitude dat i hate alot2...
hais...

this happen w/0 us knowin....
i wanna sae sorry 2 hym for the attitude dat i gif to hym...
i'm just emotionally unstable dis few daes...
dere's smth dat bothering me bt i'm nt sure wat....
i noe i gt irritatted so easily for the past few daes...
mayb wat u sae is rite la...
bt trust me i understand ur situation...
jst dat i hate to be bubbled....
u shud no me well...
nt even u but zalikha oso...
i noe u guys haf ur reasoning...
bt y mst it be alwaes me dat bcum de victim??
asl ehh???!!!
one ofter another bubblinng me...
nw i've learn my lesson...
nvr believe watever ppl sae be it some1 dat i'm close wif or wat...
i'm just scared to trust ppl nw...
sobx2....

2 more wks to sch hols....
planning 2 werk all de wae...
keeping myself bz as alwaes....
bt i'll make time 2 mit my dear syikin...
nw i just start 2 mish her... hahaha...
i just wish dat everytin cn go back to normal...
i just wish my bestie is here by my side....
i just wish life could be much easier for me...
i just wish i could spend time to the fullest...
enjoying.... laughing non-stop....
BT....
i dun tink it might happen...
de chances is so slim...
i just scared ...
scared dat i might breakdown anitime..
scared dat i cnt face future challenges...
dat's alot of things can happen dat i'm scared of...
ohh god...
please gif some strength...
sob2...

feeling down at dis moment of time....
the feeling like giving up everything dat i'm doing....
haix.... very saded...
lesson was so sux 2 de max....
dun even understand wat i'm doing in class....
dis is all bcoz of me skip last wk's lesson... stupid of me...
hais... faci was kinda irritating... dun like her @ all..... guess i'll get a C dis time..
cn't even ans her stupid question... hw stupid cn i b rite... haissss....
had cookies frm my AUNTY.... nice ... tanx euu... luv u so much... hahaha...
pity my abg going thru wat i've been going thru in de past....
ABG!!! NO MATTER WAT I'LL ALWAES B BY UR SIDE... NO MATTER WAT HAPPEN....
DUN HESITATE TO FIND ME WEN U'RE DWN OR WEN U NID SUM1 TOK 2 ....
I'LL B DERE AS AN WEN U NID ME... I'LL TRY .... JST WAN U 2 SMILE ALWAES OTEY ABG... COZ U LOOK CUTE WEN DAT SMILE OF URS IS DERE.... =p
i just dun understand sum ppl...
ppl jst simple care abt dem bt dey jst dun noe hw 2 appreciate it....
hw dumb cn dey b rite.... or are dey blind... i doubt so.... hais...
i feel like life nw is kind of wierd 4 me...
it's starting to change...
i loose everything that i used to have and nw... nth is left for me...
y uh... yyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.....
wat wu gui sae is rite... nw dere's alot of y's in my life....
hais....
watever la.....
hols soonnn woohooo!!!
finding job soon... yeah....
hopefully i cn enjoy my hols dis time....
ending here....
i'll update soon...
tyke care peeps...
camat malam.... =)

9 daes haf pass since 2008 cum.....
startin of a new year for me....
alot of things happen to me in 2007....
be it swit or sour.... good or bad...
it cnt be resist wat... hais....

wat i wan 4 dis year is simple....
to enjoy my dae each n every single min & sec....
i dun wan past 2 just repeat itself....
i've suffer alot during 2007...
been thru alot of shit...
learn alot frm it too....
nvr b too nice 2 guys....
hais...
asl eh all dis must happen...
y cnt things just be de same as wat we plan....
y cnt ppl learn hw to appreciate each other....
yyyyyyyyyy???
so many y cum thru my mind nw....
bdh kn.....

life 4 me as like usual....
boring... hahhaa... bt cn la...
i love being wif my mum n sistas....
dey realli make my dae....
sch is fun 4 me...
being ard my fwns....
wif hairah, ida, nurul, ishak, fir, my dear darren, n alot2 more...
it's fun.....
love dem.... alot2...
nt 4getin my DEAR ABG ZAKI...
noe wat.....
he kept his promise....
he's goin 2 stop smokin....
yaY!!!!
alhamdulillah....
jia you abg.... must cont 2 stop totalli orite....

trying to 4get abt my past wif hym....
like he alwaes sae..." YG SUDA 2 SUDA"....
he gt de point....
mayb it's jst difficult 4 me....
hais... bt i'll do it.... yeah....

AS 4 MY X.....
EH... TANX EH 4 DE PAST 4 MTH WIF U....
I JUST DUN UNDERSTAND U LA....
Y MST U DO ALL DIS EH....
ASL EH ? N BTW SAE TANX 2 UR BRO...
HE REALLI FUCK ME UP SIDE DWN....
N U DID NTH... WTF.... APE JENIS BF EH U....
NVR TOT U'RE DAT TYPE OF PERSON...
IT'S DE WORSE MISTAKE TO HAF U AS MY BF...
HAIS....

y must dere b ppl like dat....
hais... hurtin ppl's feeling... so heartless....
watever la...
guys will alwaes b guys...
prangai same jer....
hais...
bdh kn....

i wish i cn turn back to WAN...
hais...

*lost*